Nothing has ever changed about us; the loss of electricity just upgraded our cruelty and erased our humanity. We'd been killing each other for centuries. This time around though, the only thing that is different is our dark nature illuminated more—the savagery and the fear of the unknown future which blinded our eyes and minds to see that we had been in the dark ages before. I guess we’ve been so comfortable in our warm-canopies and forgotten how to deal with a bit of discomfort for a day, and find out a solution, yet make this as the excuse to eat each other like scavengers.

The street corners are dark, pitch-bleak to be precise. I can barely see what’s in front of me. I pretend to gaze through the window while hunkered down in the basement but all I hear is disturbing noises and painful screams. I stay silent until the sunlight comes out. That's my way of surviving one day at a time.

I don’t know what tomorrow holds for me but for now, I am much safer in my basement. Only here I can at least breathe the fire of fear with my open eyes, waiting for my turn to be extinct when the darkness takes over. Until then, I’d hide here and wittiness the loss of power bring out more of the darkness in humanity.

MidnightInk 8-29-2021

Life on Earth, according to us, is life outside of the water.

The barriers between land and water are why and how we live. Electricity isn't important except for its use to keep the pumps working. We are a civilization of--and because of--pumps. When pumps fail, the entropy begins: water seeks its own level in the places where we have forbidden such levels--our homes, our beds, our banks, our internal combustion engines, and our existentialism.

Days after the electricity failed, the water rose. It continued to rise, seeking a level that could be measured only after equilibrating with the dry world.

Water breaks down everything, so when entropy wins and there is no longer a distinction between what's dry and what's wet, chemistry ensues.

We will eventually become one with the murk, our molecules simplifying. We will finally rest in peace. What will arise out of the murk next time?

July 26, 2022 (Day 60):

I planted potatoes today, I don't know how to plant potatoes, but we need food. I reached for my phone to google "growing potatoes". I guess some habits die slowly. I remember before all this I used to hate getting dirt on me. Nature, dirt, the outside, I wasn't interested. None of that seemed important, not when I was climbing the corporate ladder. Handshakes, fake smiles and immaculate suits. That's what really mattered, not the humble toilings of individuals striving to gain from the land, but rather the manipulation and positioning to grow fat off the produce of those same individuals; to gain from society itself.

That is in the past though, and today, well today the potato rules. I am fine with this, be it from necessity or a deeper pervesian of personality through that same necessity, I don't actually miss the suits, the free client lunches and the resulting power. Though at the time nothing seemed more important, the hidden sacrifices needed only showing themselves at a time of crisis.

Loneliness. It's hollow, saddened roots had slowly worked its way into the soil of society for decades. Each new screen with a dancing cartoon, each new buzz and whistle, each new technological invention marketed as "bringing humanity closer together" served to seperate us, through distraction, through made up societal commitments and through incomparable convenience. For years I had been completely alone, yet surrounded by friendly faces separated by a thin sheet of glass. A mockery of human connection, but at the time so welcomed to one living a life of fake connections.

This is why I enjoyed planting today. I'm not just planting for myself, but for my new family. The toil is dirty and undignified but I feel more satisfied than I have for the last 10 years. The faces of the people I care for, I see them everyday, not as digital representations, not as obstacles towards my monetary gain, but as an intertwined team, all working together for the same, communal goal. My potatoes won't be bought by some corporate monster for pennies on the dollar, leaving me enough profit to restart the process. Rather they will be used directly by my family, enforcing social ties and in turn help us all stay strong. I am no longer giving my effort to a faceless void that spits back a numeric symbol of worth back up to me, I can now see how my efforts help those around me directly, I can live my value.

It's funny, it took us losing everything we thought we had to get back everything we forgot we had lost.

Out of habit I checked my phone again this morning. I don't know why I keep the thing around. It's nothing but a useless black brick now. Nothing from it to offer any hope, just a blank reminder. I guess I could try to use it as a weapon when someone decides to raid my house.

The food in the fridge went bad over a week ago. The scent is growing stronger every day. I guess that's my goal for today. Just go through and throw away what I have to and ration what I can. Can't rely on the super markets either. Not that I have access to a car any more. All of those went out with the cell phones. Besides, some asshole family walled off the parking lot and is leaving the rest of us to starve though. Rumor is there will be a raid in a couple of days. Maybe I'll try to get in on that.

I did take my dog for a walk though. I don't know if it's worth building memories with him though. I just know if I live long enough I'm going to have to eat him... God I wish I would have died in that first wave. If only I was in my car when the EMP hit I could have been killed in that big eighteen car pile up. At least then all of this shit would be over for me. But nope. I guess I'm not that lucky. I'm just cursed to live another day. I just hope I don't die right before things start getting better. And if I do live through this I hope Charlie (my dog) is right there with me.

P.S. If I die and somebody finds this, please take care of Charlie. Assuming he's still alive.