It wasn't supposed to be this way.

I was proud of my country. We the People lived freely,

We fought for democracy,

We cared for one another.

I remember being in school when the Sandy Hook massacre occurred. I remember everyone coming together,

The support and love of a country.

As I sit here today, hearing about a massacre in Las Vegas,

I feel each one of those bullets ripping through my soul.

There's so much bloodshed, and our country has been stained.

We can not wash away this hate.

We can not pray our country better.

We are a country more worried about who stands for an anthem than white supremacist marching under a Nazi flag in our own streets.

We are more concerned about the life of a statue than we are the life of our citizens.

Dear Children of America,

I am so sorry this is the America you are being introduced to. I'm so sorry you don't learn the love of our country I learned. I'm so sorry that the nation is crumbling around you and you have no power to stop it.

I'm so sorry.

The things we took:

-Food and water

-Pets

-Important Documents 

-Clothes

The things we left:

-Our Home

-Our Lives

-Our Hope

Sometimes I forget how to breathe.

I'm so composed of words and images, 

Of lust and love,

That there is no room for air to be. 

My body was not yours to make a home 

My bones the shaky structure holding up an abandoned house

Ghost whispers running up and down the hallways were my childhood used to live

The fountains of my veins dried up and my hair falling out like old shingles falling off

A vibrant mansion full of life left ruined by a natural disaster 

My body was not yours to make a home

It was not yours to rip through like a tornado 

Your fiery temper burned it 

And my tears flooded it

My body was not yours to make a home

There is something about the way he said "let's be friends"

It's the storm clouds rolling in, 

Foreboding the storm ahead

There are earthquakes pulsing through her heart and shaking her body

The wind has stolen the air from her lungs, 

She's a fish out of water

Her whole life has been to prepare her for this moment 

"don't trust strange boys"

"don't be a prude"

"there's no such thing as rape culture"

"never go anywhere alone"

It's years of grown men staring at a child because she developed early

It's years of boys will be boys

It's years of you would look better if you didn't wear baggy clothes

It's years of you'd be prettier if you smiled more

It's years of come on, you trust me, we are friends, I wouldn't hurt you

It's years of let's be friends

We never said "I love you"

Our tongues were too busy fighting for control

Our hands exploring bodies like searching for treasure

In you I have found my Holy Grail

It takes two to tango

But right now it feels more like a waltz

Because we're going slowly and symphonies are exploding in my head

You are the land and I am the sea

But somehow we blend together so perfectly

You're the solid mass beneath me

And I'm pouring myself into you

No, we never said "I love you"

But actions speak louder than words