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♥ 50% realist. 40% random. 10% other ♥ https://www.wattpad.com/user/CameoLover93
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Chapter 44 of Poetry For The Broken
Written by CameoLover93 in portal Poetry & Free Verse

I Should Have Been There

[ warning: this post contains content that may be triggering to some, so read with caution. ]

***

I should have been there for you that night. 

I should have been there for you before it all went wrong. When you needed a shoulder to cry on, I should've been there. When you needed to vent, scream, and lash out because of all the pressure you were under from your family, I should've been there.

When everyone else left you hanging and moved on because they couldn't understand your eccentric personality or character, I should've been there. When I was too far away from home to give you any type of physical comfort to help alleviate the overwhelming feeling of what it was like to be all on your own and completely vulnerable, I should've been there for you.

But, at the end of the day, I wasn't there.

Not when you needed me the most. So you ultimately hit rock bottom at a frighteningly fast pace and basically said fuck the world in the process. You finally made up your mind that you were done taking other people's shit; you were done getting used, abused, unnecessarily judged, and most of all, ignored by the people you loved the most.

You decided to take matters into your own hands on that fateful night, nearly killing us both.

I should've been there to stop you as you looked around your house for a sharp object to use on yourself. I should've been there to talk you out of dragging the large kitchen knife across your left wrist. I should've fucking been there to stop the bleeding and call for help after you fell out on your bedroom floor while the light inside your beautiful brown eyes gradually faded...

But, when it was all said and done, I wasn't there.

I wasn't the one who found and saved you that night. I wasn't the one who rode with you in the ambulance on your way to the hospital. I wasn't the one who cried by your bedside wondering to God for why you'd ever do such a crazy thing.

No, I wasn't there to make things better for you after that terrible incident passed. I wasn't there to show you how much I truly cared about you afterward. I should've figured out a way to be there for you, somehow, but I couldn't.

And in being your so-called best friend, it's been one of my biggest regrets because I know that I should've been there for you, no matter what.

I should've been there for you that night, regardless of what the fuck I was going through. Life beat me down almost as badly as it did you and whenever I needed a friend, you were right there. You were always on time which is what I should've been with you on that tragic night.

What I should have done was tried harder, done more, and said more. Maybe then, things would be different for you today; maybe your heart would be just a little less cold and broken...

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Chapter 44 of Poetry For The Broken
Written by CameoLover93 in portal Poetry & Free Verse
I Should Have Been There
[ warning: this post contains content that may be triggering to some, so read with caution. ]

***

I should have been there for you that night. 

I should have been there for you before it all went wrong. When you needed a shoulder to cry on, I should've been there. When you needed to vent, scream, and lash out because of all the pressure you were under from your family, I should've been there.

When everyone else left you hanging and moved on because they couldn't understand your eccentric personality or character, I should've been there. When I was too far away from home to give you any type of physical comfort to help alleviate the overwhelming feeling of what it was like to be all on your own and completely vulnerable, I should've been there for you.

But, at the end of the day, I wasn't there.

Not when you needed me the most. So you ultimately hit rock bottom at a frighteningly fast pace and basically said fuck the world in the process. You finally made up your mind that you were done taking other people's shit; you were done getting used, abused, unnecessarily judged, and most of all, ignored by the people you loved the most.

You decided to take matters into your own hands on that fateful night, nearly killing us both.

I should've been there to stop you as you looked around your house for a sharp object to use on yourself. I should've been there to talk you out of dragging the large kitchen knife across your left wrist. I should've fucking been there to stop the bleeding and call for help after you fell out on your bedroom floor while the light inside your beautiful brown eyes gradually faded...

But, when it was all said and done, I wasn't there.

I wasn't the one who found and saved you that night. I wasn't the one who rode with you in the ambulance on your way to the hospital. I wasn't the one who cried by your bedside wondering to God for why you'd ever do such a crazy thing.

No, I wasn't there to make things better for you after that terrible incident passed. I wasn't there to show you how much I truly cared about you afterward. I should've figured out a way to be there for you, somehow, but I couldn't.

And in being your so-called best friend, it's been one of my biggest regrets because I know that I should've been there for you, no matter what.

I should've been there for you that night, regardless of what the fuck I was going through. Life beat me down almost as badly as it did you and whenever I needed a friend, you were right there. You were always on time which is what I should've been with you on that tragic night.

What I should have done was tried harder, done more, and said more. Maybe then, things would be different for you today; maybe your heart would be just a little less cold and broken...






#nonfiction  #poetry  #life  #sad  #suicide 
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Chapter 43 of Poetry For The Broken
Written by CameoLover93 in portal Poetry & Free Verse

[ . H . Y . P . N . O . T . i . Z . E . D . ]

//he's lookin' at me again with those eyes // they hypnotize me

//and now I'm in a trance //

I want him to utilize me //my body and soul, they're both in his hands //

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Chapter 43 of Poetry For The Broken
Written by CameoLover93 in portal Poetry & Free Verse
[ . H . Y . P . N . O . T . i . Z . E . D . ]
//he's lookin' at me again with those eyes // they hypnotize me

//and now I'm in a trance //

I want him to utilize me //my body and soul, they're both in his hands //
#romance  #poetry  #poem  #love  #eyes 
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Chapter 42 of Poetry For The Broken
Written by CameoLover93 in portal Poetry & Free Verse

Cut You Out

I took the knife

to cut you out of my heart

[was it a smart move on my part?]

now I must sit back and wait

for the bleeding to start...

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Chapter 42 of Poetry For The Broken
Written by CameoLover93 in portal Poetry & Free Verse
Cut You Out
I took the knife
to cut you out of my heart

[was it a smart move on my part?]

now I must sit back and wait
for the bleeding to start...
#romance  #poetry  #life  #love  #spirituality 
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Written by CameoLover93 in portal Romance & Erotica

Ride It

The way that her body fit against his, it's almost as if she belonged there.

His hands held her waist with a firm grip; keeping her steady, he guided her hips down onto his lap. And as he cautiously sunk into her, filling her, stretching her in the most sensual way...she clenched around him, reflexively.

"So beautiful," he smiled, moaning as she began to swirl her hips against him, later riding him. "How you move when I'm inside you."

"Incredible," she muttered, gasping at the tingling sensations growing within her quivering core. "This feeling. I love it."

"And I love you," he kissed her, passionately, still holding onto her tightly, not ever wanting to let go.

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Written by CameoLover93 in portal Romance & Erotica
Ride It
The way that her body fit against his, it's almost as if she belonged there.

His hands held her waist with a firm grip; keeping her steady, he guided her hips down onto his lap. And as he cautiously sunk into her, filling her, stretching her in the most sensual way...she clenched around him, reflexively.

"So beautiful," he smiled, moaning as she began to swirl her hips against him, later riding him. "How you move when I'm inside you."

"Incredible," she muttered, gasping at the tingling sensations growing within her quivering core. "This feeling. I love it."

"And I love you," he kissed her, passionately, still holding onto her tightly, not ever wanting to let go.
#romance  #love  #erotica  #sexy  #smut 
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Written by CameoLover93 in portal Romance & Erotica

Like Candy

His kisses were both gentle and aggressive at the same time.

Underneath his naked body, her small frame trembled for release... and with each tantalizing stroke that he so expertly delivered, her hungry, greedy core shuddered in response for a more brutal sexing.

"Sweet, like candy," he whispered against her pink lips. "That's what you taste like."

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Written by CameoLover93 in portal Romance & Erotica
Like Candy
His kisses were both gentle and aggressive at the same time.

Underneath his naked body, her small frame trembled for release... and with each tantalizing stroke that he so expertly delivered, her hungry, greedy core shuddered in response for a more brutal sexing.

"Sweet, like candy," he whispered against her pink lips. "That's what you taste like."
#fiction  #romance  #poetry  #love  #sexy 
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Chapter 41 of Poetry For The Broken
Written by CameoLover93 in portal Poetry & Free Verse

Let Me

I want to touch your soul...

open your mind, not your legs

open your heart and close your mouth

let me inside...

let me in

let me...

love you...

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Chapter 41 of Poetry For The Broken
Written by CameoLover93 in portal Poetry & Free Verse
Let Me
I want to touch your soul...
open your mind, not your legs

open your heart and close your mouth
let me inside...

let me in
let me...
love you...
#romance  #poetry  #poem  #love  #soul 
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Chapter 36 of Poetry For The Broken
Written by CameoLover93 in portal Poetry & Free Verse

Low/High

you tried it...

and failed

I gave up...

you prevailed

I'm at my lowest

you're up way high

I sent you love...

you sent me lies

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Chapter 36 of Poetry For The Broken
Written by CameoLover93 in portal Poetry & Free Verse
Low/High
you tried it...
and failed

I gave up...
you prevailed

I'm at my lowest
you're up way high

I sent you love...
you sent me lies
#poetry  #poem  #life  #love  #relateable 
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Chapter 37 of Poetry For The Broken
Written by CameoLover93 in portal Poetry & Free Verse

Drown

take me down...

all the way down

don't try to pull me up

I want this

I want it

so let me have it

set me down...

let me drown

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Chapter 37 of Poetry For The Broken
Written by CameoLover93 in portal Poetry & Free Verse
Drown
take me down...
all the way down

don't try to pull me up
I want this
I want it

so let me have it
set me down...

let me drown
#poetry  #poem  #life  #relateable  #drowning 
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Chapter 38 of Poetry For The Broken
Written by CameoLover93 in portal Poetry & Free Verse

The Love of You

pain...

loving you, it hurts...

it hurts more than you could ever possibly imagine yet still I come back around for more...

and more,

of you...

now, don't ask why I do what I do because I just do...

and I do it all for the love of you

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Chapter 38 of Poetry For The Broken
Written by CameoLover93 in portal Poetry & Free Verse
The Love of You
pain...
loving you, it hurts...

it hurts more than you could ever possibly imagine yet still I come back around for more...

and more,
of you...

now, don't ask why I do what I do because I just do...
and I do it all for the love of you
#romance  #poetry  #poem  #love  #relationships 
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Chapter 39 of Poetry For The Broken
Written by CameoLover93 in portal Poetry & Free Verse

Black

lies...

always floating around in your eyes

I'm cold

and we've both spun out of control

my heart

it's as black as coal...

which is, quite similar, to that of your empty soul

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Chapter 39 of Poetry For The Broken
Written by CameoLover93 in portal Poetry & Free Verse
Black
lies...
always floating around in your eyes

I'm cold
and we've both spun out of control

my heart
it's as black as coal...

which is, quite similar, to that of your empty soul
#poetry  #poem  #life  #love  #soul 
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