Along the flowing stream, a child bore an American dream.
Down the river they flow. to the home of history's echo.
"Worry not, we'll pay" fueled the dream of education someday.
Still the light of the dream shines, but it grows darker amidst endless declines.
Dreams are tattered, the heart is shattered.
Repair the rags and set out the sail, loans reignite the hope much to your avail!
Though in this dream a lie become twisted, the fire put out by the wicked.
You need a job, the banks will still rob. You need hope, yet it's crushed to the pulp.
The parents care, but the dream is now bare. A promise unkept led to those who wept.
Lie down on your side, it's all part of the stride, and it's okay to cry.
A promise we will sow, but surely the wicked will mow.
Reignite the promise we declare for the nation, one day we dream what matters most will once again be education.
The rock heart
A fleshy heart is one weak to a stab, a stone heart could break too, but it can take your stabs with ease. I would prefer to crack than to bleed, for you are not someone I need.
You tell me you scare yourself, truly before I didn't care. Now that you're lost in time, I can't help but feel at fault, you look at her like a wilting rose but still she stands tall. You, with every ounce of power, you try to heal her with your own energy, she is in her prime like a rose. But with your dream you were pricked and poisoned, you twisted reality with your own eyes. "The fan walked" you told me, but it was just a thing, what had to have happened to make you think this... I see you talking to things, I hear you threatening them. Slowly but surely everything around you breaks and you don't care, there is no light in this house and there is no way out. Papers scattered across the floor gradually becoming harder and harder to understand, but they all say the same thing... You began to run away in your own desperation, I saw you that night and for the first time I felt true fear. I saw you laughing it off like it was nothing, I was shivering not from the cold but from your sickening eyes and your warped smile. I told you then "Dad, I'm scared" and you thought nothing of it. Now they record you, now they're swarming to you, they're all petrified with worry but we all knew it would come to this. Your house was empty not a trace of you in sight, like you died but your presence was still fresh. Lights are on, the water runs, the radio blares! Now I sit here in regret knowing I did wrong by not fighting by your side, I didn't do enough to help you, now you're stuck in a timeless sky of your own insanity... Where are you? What are you? Who are you?
Find your fire
Hope is a dream that is just out of reach, to see the sun after being in the pale darkness and to be in its warm embrace. To feel again after being in a numb state. To grow your wings and fly beyond the clouds to the stars. Whatever harms you, hope is your escape, even it's a dying flame like its only place is on the wick of a candle slowly melting its way to an inevitable extinguish, hope is the dream that the flame can carry on to grow larger and to last longer.
Beauty in the eyes of the beheld
Could've been a dream or a thought out of mind. This was a man that couldn't be judged, to see things as they were but still to love them. To care about simple things for their value when others would ignore. To be in the presence of darkness but take note of the powerful light that created it instead. To understand that imperfection is perfection in a different sense. He cared about creation and destruction, but he thought of them as the same, he cared about good and bad but they were too the same. He didn't care what people expected of him and he didn't take the shape of anything to fit in, when thrown into a battle he needed no weapon but only his heart and words. When challenged he would laugh in its face and already claim his victory, which left his challenger in curious confusion.
He was a man you couldn't help but follow, despite not changing at your desire he was still your dream of perfection. He chased after what couldn't be followed but did it anyway because he could, he did what he was told couldn't be done because he could, and he did it all with a smile and he didn't give his worries the chance to overcome him because he accepted them. With just a smile he could change light to chase away the darkness, just a conversation was enough to love him, just a laugh was enough to make you wish that in another life or in another time that he could be yours. He was a lie but one told to ease your pain, he was a story told to explain hardship, he was love but in a way you would never know. He challenged you to face your pains because he knew you were stronger, he would motivate you into better change, he would cry your tears so that you could smile for his joys.
Despite it all he was as he taught, he wasn't everything you dreamed him to be. He was his own person with his own thoughts and needs, and he let us all know that he couldn't be what we wanted but instead what we needed.
Within my heart, made of dreams, are femboys, serving beautiful whipped creams~
Who will judge
In an uncertain, Godless world there is hope of something new. A promise made by a man built from pain tells us that we can have hope of a better life. The loss of truly beloved, a crippling self hatred taken out on others, bearing the pain of watching loved ones suffer. For whatever reason they suffer they don't have to worry about those pains in the next world, he promises resurrection, he promises change, he promises hope. He calls them together to fight for his cause because alone he can't inherit what the Gods left when they abandonded us. Through strength, intelligence, faith, and loyalty he will take them to the next world that he will create. No more pain, no more loss, no more bad things- there will only be good things in this world but at a cost... In order to have this new world, this one would have to die and that wasn't an issue for many since they just wanted to leave this horrible place behind. Even though some had nothing in this world to miss they couldn't help but still think they were doing the wrong thing, but they kept on with the belief that it wouldn't matter when the next world was here. Nobody was sure if it truly was possible but that was the blind faith they were willing to have for such great things. If people had to get hurt to achieve this goal then so be it, they had better stay out of their way before they don't get a chance to be in the new world. The long fight has gone on for too long but soon there will be peace, but this world can't have peace because of its design, so there's only one option left.
I know you
Youngest of the set, I never knew the secrets of our family until I grew older. Mom's eternal silence and Dad's never ending cries. One day I was dreaming, a dream that I knew wasn't just a dream, sitting in the living room with Mom and Dad, but it wasn't just us 3, you were there, watching me live my life. You were sitting outside the window mourning the life you never had, jealous that I had what you desired most. I saw your face and I ran outside, you ran away from me but all I wanted was to know you, we ran in the fields together like we were playing tag! You would've been just older than me, we were perfect for each other.
Forever I yearned for a sibling like me, not some crazy lunatic that wanted to kill me, nor one that would abandon us so that he could have the freedom he yearned for, and not one that couldn't hold herself together from the pressure of it all. I'm no better than the rest I know, but I never ran, I had my moments where I fell down and wanted to run away or hide from the pain. It was unescapable, and then I found you! Even though I never really met you, I always knew there was something- someone missing from this. It was you our beloved, I mourn the loss of a sister I never knew, a face I never saw, a presence I've never truly felt. I understood Mom's silence, I understood Dad's infinite mourning, I understood you! You wish that you were here so that you could grow, love, learn, and experience anything and everything you were fated to be. Even though I never knew you I look around at all of our photos and I can see you in each and every one of them, your wide smile, short brown hair, small little nose, and most of all I can see your moony eyes weeping over your life. You watch over Mom because she still cries when she's alone, you watch over Dad because he tries to act strong enough but he cries and prays to see you again every moment of every day. You watch over each of us and you just want to fit into every photo and you're jealous that it was me that had your life. I never asked to have it, but if it were my choice I'd take your place in a heartbeat, if I had the power to trade with you I would, if I had the power to just give you even a single breath of life I would.
To hear your laugh, to see your smile, to hate and to love you like a sibling over stupid little things, to watch you grow up, and to watch you make stupid mistakes so I could laugh with you would make it all worth it. It was confirmed to me that you did exist and I thought I was crazy to know, Dad told me and he asked me never to tell Mom that I knew because it would kill her to feel that loss again. All in a flash of a moment I felt like I'd known you my entire life, I'd seen that smile, those beautiful eyes that shined with tears of moonlight because every night you felt forgotten. If you knew the pain and the grief in our hearts you would be at ease knowing that we all still love you after all these years, you were never forgotten and your memory was passed down into each of us. I became numb to all emotion but just the thought of you makes my heart ache and chills will fill the air, but your presence is always with us and it warms us when we remember you. I never thought I could love someone I never met but then I saw your face. Every day of my life I hope to always be with you and one day I hope I can meet you and be with you until the end of days so I can tell you about everything you've wanted to know. I will always know you.
At the bottom of the mountain all I see is misery, empty souls walking around endlessly searching for something to fill their lives with meaning. I’ve lost my faith in people after seeing the horrible things people can think of and things that they do shamelessly just to benefit themselves, I see people hurt others for such simple reasons, such stupid reasons. In my life I figured there was only one way to escape but there was a spark, a fire burning deep inside of me that no matter how dark the world was it still shined on. It lit up the lands for a little bit, and I saw the mountain, that sun that always shined but only at the top, I knew that to get there it would be hard but worth it. I journeyed to the mountain and endured the pains it threw at me as a test, I fell many times and I became lost in the patterns of life, like I was in a maze and there was no escape, but at every end there was that option "Give up" and there would be a mirror that you just had to stare into, it physically hurts to look into it. You live lifetimes in seconds, you relive it all and it crashes into you like a wave, and the tides pull you in with no mercy. One day I stared into that mirror and my reflection handed me a knife, I took it and my eyes flooded with warm tears that caressed my smile of regret, I clenched onto the handle but I was shocked back into reality and I saw a beautiful boy with shaggy black hair towering over me with a golden beams of light shining around him, he had a warm smile and he offered his hand to me. He picked me up and he guided me through so much of the maze, but one day he dissappeared and I became lost again, and I felt like it was my fault that he abandoned me. Feeling like I wasn't in my right mind and like I wasn't safe I looked at our beautiful child that reminded me so much of him, I cried having to make a decision not knowing if I was being smart or not, "Should I give him up?" I wondered, let him go to his father where he can be happier and safer, I don't know if I can take care of him anymore I thought to myself, and I nearly did it. I nearly let the darkness take away the last of my light, but he hugged me and said he didn't want to leave me. I finally made it to the base of the mountain with many scars from the years of wandering, and I started climbing it seeing that bright light at the top radiating that energy into me to keep me climbing, flashes of darkness attacked me as I went up but I overcame them, my body ached and yearned for my journey to be over but that was my fuel to keep going. Just as I reached the top I touched the star and it danced with me, I spun happily on the summit finally being free from the numbing pains, I could feel again, I could look at myself again without the thoughts invading my mind, I no longer stared at that cursed knife begging myself to just end it, now it's just a memory that makes me smile, because I overcame its alluring and devilish charm. I know that any day I could fall off the top of this mountain, but I won't worry about that now, because I see others about to reach the top too, and people are welcoming me here, and if I'm to fall down there again, I know I'll be strong enough to reach the top.
You are a man built of stubborness, stupidity, and ignorance, you are a hypocrite, an enigma. I've always hated you, and you knew it deep down in your mind, but you have always chosen to be blind, every second of my life I spent fighting to get away from you because of your blindness, you would tell me that you loved me and you would scream at me the next, making it obviously clear how you really felt about me. Today was no different, this year I set aside all of my fears because everyone else knew that you couldn't be helped, but for some reason I believed that I was ready to take on the challenge that was helping you. For once in my life I reached a point where I felt like nothing could ever stop me or slow me down, I was ready to help you I thought, with him out of the way it could be easy... No, you were damaged, so much worse now, or maybe just the same, and I wasn't used to it. Everyday you'd scream to your brother and argue with him, and now you're literally losing your mind from it all, alone, heartbroken, delusional, hated, betrayed, and worst of all, trapped. Your house screams "Insane" and everyone heard the house's warning, even I did, but I ignored it thinking I was strong enough. I kneeled down beside you while you were foaming out of the mouth with your constant babbling and your stack of papers scibbled on with millions of notes of numbers and unintelligible writing of dates, you never set your phone down to give yourself peace. Whenever it rang it was like an addict getting the fix they needed, but instead of relief it was anger that you needed. I took the phone away because you would text over and over, call day and night about the same things and then you would get mad about something that never happened. I spent hours that night trying to work with you to get a new job since this was the core of your problem, being with him everyday. You refused to get any new job, I tried to look for a new place for you to live because you were trapped here like we were before, and every moment of misery we've endured here could be buried, but you wanted to hold onto it because that was when you were at peace. I tried to convince you to take the problems to court, but you refused because you said that it wasn't gonna work. I sat down in frustration not knowing what else I could do. You can't help someone who refuses to help themselves I reminded myself, I teared up because I was alone in making this decision, nobody else cared, I don't really care what happens to you, but it's me who's responsible for taking care of you and I can't understand why I did ever accept to help you. I woke up the next morning and I simply asked you to help me look for something in the room of memories, a piece of all of us were scattered around the room making it impossible to move around, all I did was ask for help, and you got mad and started screaming at me, so I rolled my eyes and ignored you and said I'd do it myself then. You kept going on, it started to infuriate me how you started getting mad over something so little, all of it started building inside me, my patience shattered and I yelled back at you because I'm not the scared little girl I once was, I said if you screamed at me one more time I'd scream back at you louder, and you challenged me by saying "The hell you will" with a little scoff, I got out of my seat and grabbed my things and put them in the car, then I came back in to see you with all of your papers gathered up ready to take the same notes you always do, I shook my head in disbelief not knowing why I wasted my time trying to help you, that stupid boy walked in and he just stood in the door, I stared at him and my message was clear "I'm out of patience" and he knew it, he sat on the couch in silence and I marched back to the bathroom with tears of regret forcing themselves out of my eyes, I was a fool. You did your signature trick of playing innocent with your weak lie of "I love you, what's wrong?" and I shut you up fast, "I don't ever want to see you again, I don't care what happens to you, get some fucking help from someone else, I don't care if you go to jail or what!" in my broken and hesitant voice, and I stormed back throught the house, just like on that cursed night that I know so well. I passed by that stupid boy you trusted so much and I said "get him some help, I don't care how" and I slammed the door behind me, and that's just one of the many reasons I won't ever look back at you again.