Katherine Robertine Elizabeth Toter-Cobb. We was all flummoxed by such a regal name. Mama has some history attached to it but she only showed us the peeking corners and dirty obscurities.

Momma stole books and burned them after ‘eating’. Shed whisper that it felt like eating anyway. Perhaps the only time she wasn’t listing. Momma believed in divine winds. She wouldn’t ever fight em. She wanted a hero, so bad. Her favorites were the ones who died at the end. Nothing confusing about that.

Katy-Rob they called her. Daddy called Momma pretentious. Or pretty contentious. It was one of the only times she looked at him with love. I magine she thought it witty. I did. After that look she went on to the pharmacy and Daddy went to buy tickets. I caught up to her looking real intent on some new tennis shoes.

Know when you gaze up and on a thing cher, you change it?

I know that mama.

Oh youre so erudite, you.

What?

Momma was Cajun and though she was supposed to be so smart she talked just like everyone else, cept kinda dumber for that couyon shit. In every picture I every saw of her she was showing her long white teeth, like she was trying to sell something. Later I came to see she was trying to prove to the world she wasn’t poor.

From the moment I was conceived, I was aware of the whispers and the many voices behind the home which I bloomed. I always knew I was rather different. I was attuned to my own heartbeat, listening intently to the humming of birds and the cries of agony.

I like to spend my times alone, in the comfort and security of the night. No one can see my tears as they roll silently down my cheeks. I fight to breathe as the moon illuminates the rose bush full of thorns which it was born into.

I watch the birds as they fly along the clouds, singing and chirping in a strong formation. I wonder where they will go, envious that I am not as free as they are.

I really just want

A plain and simple life

To be a good mom

And a loving wife

I don't want a man

Always holding my hand

Just one that takes time

To love and understand

One who'd tell the truth

Even when it hurts

Not run behind my back

Chasing more skirts

Bouquets of flowers

And flashy diamond rings?

No, I'd prefer not to be

Gifted such things

Instead, he would run me

A bath when I'm sick

Or write a cute note

When he's been a real dick

He'd spend time enjoying

Things I like to do

While I color 'cuntcake'

He'd color 'fuck you'

I'd be on his mind

And he'd ensure this I know

By not being scared

To let his feelings show

In return I would gift him

All his demands

Send him to paradise

With just my bare hands

Oh baby mine, what can I do?

The darkness has a hold of you-

Bubonic plague, remove the child-

Unloose the babe you have defiled!

Delivery of lifelessness 

Is what you left as I confess

A ghost is all that you may see,

However, with eternity 

Amazing secrets are revealed.

The truth released is not concealed,

And I am here to challenge Death-

Return my child the gift of breath,

For I am pressing in to steal 

The life you take and as I heal

An infant, come and wrestle me-

Oh Death, I offer openly-

Return the fullness of his health,

And I will garnish you with wealth.

You cannot bargain with a ghost?

Contentious fool, you choose to boast?

Unfortunate that you decline.

Remorse shall be your concubine!

The baby you have come to kill

I cannot pass into your will.

Prepare to meet a different fate-

Relinquish him from heaven's gate!

Unhallowed beast, a robe adorned 

Is nothing to a woman scorned

For fury of a hellish Saint 

Enrages black, the color, quaint,

About your body, nothing new.

Oh yes, my god, I know the view-

A mass of skeletons connive

Unless, of course, I did survive

To cling to life, a purpose, serve

The baby who does not deserve

To forfeit life at your behest-

Oh really, now I pass the test?

And what, I wonder, willingly,

Consider you eternally?

Oh, God above does not agree,

And though a pagan and a tree

Consist of who I used to be,

Destruction of this devilry 

Enlists a mother, riddled plea-

Corrupting sickness now must flee!

Away and haunt us here no more-

The child my heart and soul adore

Escapes your grip as in a word,

Resists the measure he has heard,

For Odin's sake, the ravens fly,

Insisting that no child shall die-

Oh Death, take me and haul me off-

No longer shall my baby cough!

Around him, see my light engage,

And though your grimace full of rage

I cannot see in skull bound teeth,

I feel your presence like a wreath 

About my neck hung like a noose-

Away! My child is free; is loose!

The measure of the rising sun

Ensures me now your wrath is done

For we are fading in the light,

And as we go, I win the fight.

A baby coos; a nurse maid calls,

So long, sweet boy, your mother falls

As Death and I disperse beyond,

Forever know we have a bond.

A knight arriving joins the fray;

Enables you for brighter days.

Unknown dimensions call me north,

And still I linger back and forth.

A mother's love can conquer all,

So as I pass beyond the wall,

The mark upon your heart I give

Repels the plague that you may live.

Remember me and do not grieve-

I smile as Death and I must leave.

Oh baby mine, forget me not.

A corpse may wither, stink, and rot,

However love is never far-

A simple thought and where you are

So, too, am I- now rest my dear,

And never worry, fret, or fear

Or delve into the realm of strife.

I leave you with the gift of life ...