The restaurant where you used you work closed down. It had good food, remember?
We went in one day and your co-workers thought we were siblings.
It’s not just closed now.
It’s boarded and tagged up, run-down.
It feels right.
You’ve missed so much and you’ve so much to miss till we’re both missing things.
It won’t matter so much then.
I guess I care
I can tell you what I’ve been through
What I go through
How I feel about it
I can describe the color and shape of every bush
The way the wind blows
How the sun feels on my skin
What the sound of waves provokes in me
What the desert tells me when no one else is listening
I can tell you all about the things I share with no one
I could offer you these pieces of sand about me and the simplicity beyond the complexity behind me
I can tell you how much I smoke
How little I drink
Who I read and why
I can tell you about my family, the role I play, the disappointments and achievements
I can tell you all of my predicaments
I can tell you about my REM dreams and my visions
I could give you multiple daily updates and stories
Write a novel or series of all the things that have happened to me
Things I’ve caused to happen unintentionally and exactly every time I got my way and how
I could give you names, dates, prices, and costs
I could tell you about everything except the things I can’t remember
And the most interesting part is that the truth about what it’s like to be me is hidden in those forgotten moments
Moments I surrendered to time as quickly as I could
While I grasp only the most pleasant things because I so desperately want those moments to have more significance.
How am I? How am I…. How… am… I.
Well, I came to be because two people did the dirty. That’s how I be.
Here’s my proposition: cancel those who cancel things.
I said it
You wanna cancel me? You can’t cancel me cause I’m cancelling you! Hah! Can’t cancel me no-ow!
Cancel the cancellers. Cancel them!!!!!
Cancel canceling. Boom. Done. Problem solved. It’s like a double-negative. It makes a positive and in order for us to make that positive impact, we must cancel canceling.
Who’s with me?
There was a ringing in my ear I couldn’t get rid of
It rang and rang and rang
I went looking for it
Every time I heard it closer, it would ring again from far away
It rang and rang and rang and rang
I saw it
The floaty in my eye
The ringing in my ear
I couldn’t catch them and they wouldn’t disappear
I like disappearing into people
When I have no one to disappear into, I don’t know who I am
I used to be someone
I’ve got vague memories of it
Being happy every once in a while
Or was I
Maybe I’ve just been disappearing into people all my life
It’s as close as I can get to actually disappearing
But I have standards
If you know what I mean
I won’t disappear into just anyone
It has to be someone I want to disappear into
The problem is being alone
I’ve never been that good at it
Because when I’m alone
I have no one to disappear into
So I just want to
My ideas come to me at the most inconvenient times:
In the middle of a shower while I’m soaping my face
In stop and go traffic that won’t forgive a nanosecond of neglect
During a team game just as the ball is being passed to me
While I’m on top of a ladder, alone, fending off injury
These genius ideas that I later forget
Come and tease me without regret
In the middle of things that I can’t neglect
I look for them later, but find that they left
Leaving behind only a fleeting feeling of what could have been
Trust the world
It has your best interest at heart
The informercial will inform you of all the ways you need something you never imagined needing
All you have to do is listen
Your boss is just trying to help you become a better version of yourself.
Your parents tried to guide you the best they could with the things they approved of when they were young.
It’s all going to be ok
Lay your head and rest now, babe
SNOCA: Small victory 1
I forgot to get my coffee when I went to the grocery store earlier. I also chose not to get orange juice. I got home, changed my mind and decided I needed orange juice for breakfast, didn’t want to go back to the same grocery store, so I went to another grocery store, which also has a coffee shop, got my juice, got my coffee. It’s the small victories.
If you look far back enough, you can see…
The dust nowhere near settled
A musty breeze attacks
A deep, red glare from far beyond
From where? No one can tell
Sulfur and the driest heat
The smell of rotting eggs and meat
There’s nothing left to do
Was it ever up to you?