I threw the clock out the window. It ticks and clicks in its unbearably accurate rhythm. I hear it. Everywhere I go it is there.

It is like that bad memory stuck in the back of your head which You wish would be gone. But still it clicks. It is screaming like a cacophony. Erupting in its harsh, on-time ticks. Even when I leave my house I hear it.

I imagine it. Counting down my time left. Begging for the time it misses a tick or click. Begging for the handles to stop twirling for life.

Begging for the batteries to run out.

Begging for my batteries to fall out.

It doesn’t go away, even if I wanted it to.

I have a low mood,

I have lost interest in everything I was ever good at,

It has lingered in my life for as long as I can remember.

I cannot sleep; the insomnia is frequent, it tosses and turns me like a boat.

I feel useless,

I feel guilty,

It is unbearable.

I do not know when it will end.

I hope I do not feel this way for ever.

It doesn’t go away, even if I wanted it too.

So my wish is for it to be gone. Maybe I hope I will be too.

(p.s just a poem I am very happy)

First light at the dawn,

Fragile bud unfurls with hope,

Promise in petals.

River's ceaseless flow,

Carving valleys, shaping stones,

Youth's endless journey.

In the heart of storms,

Ship finds its guiding star's light,

Midlife's sturdy mast.

Autumn leaves descend,

Tapestry of stories told,

Wisdom in their fall.

Worn path, valleys crossed,

Snow-capped peaks of age we tread,

Seasoned traveller.