I woke up this morning.

I opened my eyes and although blurry, I could see the walls of pinkish hue around me. Though still dark, I could see the frames on the wall containing beautiful memories of days gone by with the loves of my life.

I could hear the sweet chirping of birds in the trees in my garden, already starting their busy day.

I could feel the soft warmth of my bed, then the heat of a warm shower that soothed the aches and pains of my body telling me I'm still alive.

I could smell then taste the sweet and bitter flavor of the Italian coffee made in the comfort of my warm kitchen.

Thanks to technology no one dreamed of when I was young, I could avoid traffic caused by an overturned tractor trailer and arrive at work on time and safely, while listening to music in my car.

I have employment that allows me to pay bills, provides health insurance, checks an item off my bucket list, causes very little stress and is flexible enough that I can pursue other passions, and, most importantly, support my loves in all the ways they need and I wish.

I am blessed with a healthy, happy, loving son.

I am blessed with the ever blooming love of the man I called my prince charming over 30 years ago.

I am blessed with the lifelong love of a strong woman who overcame many tragedies to give us both a good life.

I am blessed with a few wonderful friends whose lives have been intertwined with mine for more than three or four decades.

Although alone this morning, I am not alone in this world. I love and am loved every moment of every day. We have faced and will face many difficulties, but a burden shared is a burden halved...or quartered...and sometimes ceases to be a burden at all.

Counting my blessings each and every day that I have breath and remembering that Life is good.

Spring peeps

its head gentle

green

Tulips spear

Apple blossoms near

Rain murmurs

rivers roar

Blessed be

Days lengthen

Sun strengthens

Earth gives birth

in mirth

and girth

lightning blazes through

summer thunder

Blessed be

Autumn glory

harvest beckons

bounty bulges

fatted calf

leaves fly free

nature stores

as night grows

Blessed be

Glimmering winter

water steaming

through frozen icy

cracks

sparkling snow

white crisp shards

of endless night

Blessed be

There was a time

hard now to remember

before fear encircled every aspect of life

masks holding in emotions anxiety loss

suffocating

hope appreciation security

those things and the calm

needed to acknowledge

the good.

There was a time

when every night I wrote down

five blessings in my life

to remind myself

of those things important

and

selfishly

to bring on restful

sleep.

It's been over a year

since sleep came

before dawn

and even when it comes

I don't count another day

as a blessing.

Another beautiful day

The sunshine and the rain

New mercies given to me every day from a good God

Food and water and tea

A place to live and sleep

Blankets and pillows

Cuddles with my cats

Pens and pencils

The skills I have

My job (I don't love it, but I'm thankful to be able to make money)

Breath in my lungs

Organs that function

Medicine

Mac and cheese

I'm thankful that the hospital my grandma died in was okay with everyone being in the hospital room. I'm thankful they let visitors inside because they didn't have to do that. I know that's not often the case these days, and the only reason was she had been in the hospital long enough that they didn't consider her (or my grandpa) contagious anymore.

I'm thankful I still have both of my parents

I'm thankful for my siblings,

for living in America right now when there is no peace in the Middle East

God made a way of salvation for the Gentiles through the sacrifice of His only Son, Jesus.

There is forgiveness for my sins when I confess them and God is faithful to forgive and cleanse me from all unrighteousness.

He began the good work of my salvation and sanctification and is faithful to complete it.

He has been merciful and kind to me, when I have never deserved it, even on my best day. He is kind to everyone, the good and the evil. The just and unjust. The ungrateful.

For Christ's imputed righteousness, that the work for my salvation was done on the cross.

There is hope for all who will hope in Christ, to repent and believe. That we can call upon his name for salvation, that God even gave us, His enemies, hope of redemption in the first place.

There is a way out of the eternal wrath of God and it's through his love and compassion and what Jesus did. He took the whole cup of wrath we all deserve. Every single penny was paid for. He was beaten beyond human recognition and pierced for our transgressions and condemned by His own people. Jesus did the will of God perfectly and willfully, and it was God's will to crush him for our iniquities.

the way we sing

ice ice baby

the back beat an ecstasy

when i said

this bar is

pumpin’

and i meant poppin’

the comedy shows

behind the microphone

jack and cokes

laughing away the unknown

one day i’ll find a mask

in my coat pocket

shrug and drop it

The me-before-yesterday baked cinnamon rolls and this morning today-me warmed one up and enjoyed the delicous pastry with some delicious coffee.

And even though I have had too much pain the past year, I have also had too much joy: morning cuddles with the kitties and my partner, watching butterflies on early morning hikes, and taking all of the extra time given to me by Chaos to write more often.

Everyday I am thankful for the three companions—one human and two felines—I share my life with.

For all the pain this year and before I can only be thankful that it made me funnier.

Five is just a lovely number and I have an odd feeling of joy when it bleeds out from my pen. Write a five right now and maybe you will see what I mean.

Six years ago I went to the movies and held someone's hand and I haven't let go since, except to shit, shower, and shave, of course.

I have seven niblings and they are all pretty cute.

Yesterday I saw my mother-in-law for an early Mother's Day Celebration and we ate pizza and chicken wings and laughed together for the first time in a year.

Nine years ago I was alone and scared and high and this morning I am typing away on my Macbook with a cat quietly purring next to me. And now, when I am scared, I am not alone.

Sardines come in little tin cans so that you can stack them neatly on top of each other. They also have fun, little tops that roll back. Did I mention the flavors? They come in so many flavors and no matter what my partner says I love them all.

I am a pretty down to earth person.

All the money and flashy stuff does not impress me.

I count the little things-

they add up to a mountain of freedom and happiness.

Little things...like when I wake up to face another day

or when my daughter cracks a silly joke.

When my son asks to help me clean up or help with supper

Watching my garden grow- flowers blooming

Checking my mail - HA

Watching my daughter dance in her recital

or when my son makes a goal in soccer.

Having my husband/best friend beside me everyday.

Having a job-

My dogs curling up next to me

My mother going on a trip that she so deserves

Looking at the sunset or reading a book

Music of any kind and gummy bears-

All these little things add up - and I count them.

I love and appreciate these little things.