For the Love of Furry Critters
Hurt an ANIMAL? Are you furrin' kidding me?! What the fur, man?! That is NOT acceptable!
One thing I absolutely cannot stand is when people mistreat and abuse their pets, be they cats, dogs, birds, or iguanas! Every desh time I see a post on the book of faces about a pet that was rescued from an evil brekshner of an owner, I wanna climb through my desh computer and break their furrin' nose! I wanna give the same desh treatment they gave to their helpless pet, or worse!...Chain your pet and starve it? How about we starve your stupid akk and let you furrin' starve?! Beat your pet? I'll gladly take a 2x4 and beat the snot out of your akk! Set Fluffy or Rover on fire? How about I come over and tar and feather your akk until your durk falls off? Break any of your pets bones? I'll be right over to twist your furrin' arms and legs behind your back until every bone if furrin' broke!
And if your poor pet DIED because of your negligence? I'll bring a furrin' CREW over to torture you within an inch of your pathetic life, revive you, then wash-rinse-repeat until you're furrin' BEGGIN' to die!
Furrin' piece of shizafizz! Don't let ME catch you harming an animal!