my emotions are in pain

as if someone pulled out my lungs

dragged them across the wooden floor

and put them in icy water

only to leave me with a fever

that I can’t touch

the heat spreading through my skin

yet leaving me numb

powerless

with a whole gaping inside

blood streaming

but body intact

mind working

everything working, are you sure?

the strings that build me

they tangle

they shift

I feel so outside

sensations disturbing my matter

leaving me blind to logic

no sanity to sign on the dotted line

just this thing that I have

something without a name

it prays on me

but it also leaves

it always does

the only words falling out of me

are

it will get better... just not today

...

It’s hard to say what my creative side would be

Although some people say it’s easy to see

But I continue to look, continue to search

Who knows? Maybe I’ll find it in Church

Come Priest, I need to ask you a question

You see, I have this… obsession

My creative side, what can it be?

If only I knew, I’d be a little more happy

I’m sorry boy, but I can’t answer your question

But I’m here if you ever need to use confession

Creativity is something I can not teach

But maybe you’ll find your answer dwelling at the beach

So to the beach I went, and sat on the sand

Ignoring my thoughts, they’re just a wasteland

I don’t know my creative side, oh what could it be?

Maybe I’m just meant to sit here by the sea

And so I sat, with nothing nothing to do

Staring towards the ocean as the wind blew

Maybe that part of me died

Maybe I have no creative side

Upon this conclusion I called it a day

Walked home, had nothing to say

Sat down for dinner, neglected my food

My parents quickly noticed my mood

Cristian, what’s the problem?

You said this day was supposed to be… “awesome”

Instead you come home without a word to say

You look as if you want to fly away

Well, you see it seems I’ve lost a part of me

It’s gone, I don’t know where it is, I’ve lost my creativity

I give up, it’s way too late

These are the cards dealt to me by fate

Cristian, now think! That’s quite absurd!

Your mind is probably just blurred

You can’t ever lose your creativity

You just need to try a new activity

I remembered her words and kept them in mind

How could I have been so blind!

My creative side, oh what can it be?

I guess we’ll have to wait and see