It may be cruel fate that brought us together,

It gave me hope and took it back without any mercy.

The first time I ended us, I blamed my cold dark heart

while I felt only numb,

The second time I did that, I drove a nail deep into my heart,

In the end, I had let one more person to stomp

on my bleeding, red-stained heart,

What a beautiful miserable fate…

Perhaps its pathetic that I am desperate to see you, that I need you with every fibre of my being. More than the need to be with you, its the need to quell the questions inside me that makes me desperate. Was my friendship ever worthy of you? You always reside in my thoughts, everytime I remember our conversations, I feel the need to come after you and ask for closure. We never dropped off one day, we just drifted apart slowly, rather than hold on like you promised you let me go. I just wish I could know somehow that you remember me now, that you miss me...

My chest burning with unspent emotions,

choked my voice;

Unspoken words residing inside me,

rot my mind;

Desperation clogging my heart,

made me dizzy;

But a part of me, broken but still alive,

reminded me, the simple pleasure of

being alive,

Tugging my lips into a bright smile

out of habit, further chipping away

my resolve to end it...My Life...

The worst thing about living your whole life tiptoeing around others and being wary of silence is that one day the control will snap and the fear that has controlled you each day will slowly transform into white-hot rage, not at them but at yourself for letting them ruin you.

And this rage will either destroy you or save you...

The cold seeped into her bones, dread roiling in her gut, as she waited for the Storm, which will pierce the silence that descended in the air. It came, the Storm, this time it left her gasping, she was given the ultimatum that she knew she will receive eventually..... How are you supposed to choose the person you love more, when you have never dreamt of a day they will fall apart? when you love them so fiercely, who will you chose to lose, who will you choose to be with?

If i could write a letter to my youthful self these are the things i want to tell her...

One thing i want to warn you of is Expectations , they will only drag you down further . Never expect that everything will ever be normal ,never expect them to see sense ...the only thing i will assure you is that whatever will come your way you will be ready for them because you are strong and more brave than you realize. Hold on with your whole heart , there is gonna be bigger bumps along the road but trust me when i say you will survive.. because you will !

One thing i want to ask of you is to never give up whatever happens, to move forward even if you are tired to the bones , you should cry if you need to but promise me that you will not forget to smile...

Forgiveness is the first step towards self healing...

If you can learn to forgive a person , it doesn't mean that you excuse that person of their mistake, whereas it means that you are giving them a chance to prove to themselves that the mistake doesn't define them, the readiness to change defines them.

If you can understand the reasons behind a person's deed,then definitely you can understand yourself better and forgive yourself.

THERE ARE MOMENTS WHEN TIME COMES TO A STANDSTILL, AND YOU FEEL LIKE YOU ARE DROWNING, EVEN AFTER NUMEROUS ATTEMPTS OF GASPING FOR BREATH. STILL, IT FEELS LIKE YOU ARE GONNA DIE . RIGHT AT THIS MOMENT, THAT'S WHAT FAYRA IS FELLING, AS IF ANY MOMENT EVERYTHING IS GOING TO COME CRASHING DOWN. EVERYONE AROUND HER IS CHATTERING HAPPILY , WAITING FOR HER TO TIE THE KNOT WITH THE BRIDE GROOM THEY FOUND FOR HER .WITH EACH PASSING MOMENT , HER GUT TIGHTENED WITH DREAD .SHE WILLED HER BODY TO GO NUMB TO KEEP THE PANIC SWIRLING AT THE EDGES OF HER SANITY FROM CREEPING INTO HER SOUL.