Do you ever feel like you’re stuck in your own head like every bad thing about you just keeps replaying over and over again until you just break?

The way he hurt you, the pain keeps stabbing you the words “I don’t want you” never leave his lips when he said that to you. You’re broken and you can’t be fixed.

As he looked down at his feet he whispered the words I love you.

His eyes rose to her face, he looked her in the eye and said “I have always loved you” he thought she would run that she would never feel the same but instead she answered with the same three words that he had been dying to hear since the first day he met her.

I love you, those are the only three words I can think of when I think of you. You brought light to my life and I wouldn’t want it to be anyone else. I’m so glad that I found you because you push the bad memories away and make new amazing ones and I couldn’t ask for anything more. When I want to cry you make me smile when we fight you make me laugh and all I can say is thank you. Thank you for everything, I love you.

I don’t remember it very well

I was only 5

But when I close my eyes I see you screaming

I’m not scared of you

I’m scared of myself

You gave me so much pain and anger

You said sorry

You couldn’t even look me in the eye

I don’t think you care

I want to ask you why

Why did you do it so many times like it was normal

Why did you put me through so much pain

I still blame myself

I am now 15 and I still ask what did I do wrong to make you hate me

My counsellor says I am very strong

But I’m not

I’m just good at hiding that I am dying inside

That I am scared of what I could do if I let it all out

I want to ask how do you still look me in the eyes and pretend it’s okay

I hurt myself in my sleep now

I am scared I will turn into you

I can’t say I hate you because I don’t

I don’t feel anything towards you

I just want to know why.

Trying to gather my thoughts

Fragments and pieces lost

And I’ve splintered slowly over time

From the way you get left behind

Maybe I’m better off

Cause you’ve broken me

A million pieces round my feet

You can’t say to me

“It’s gonna get better”

And you took my heart

Left behind a healing scar

Medicine can only go so far

To help you get better

But you’re still broken

Practice makes perfect.

I practice to care and get hurt.

I practice to hide my feelings.

And now I'm perfect at pretending.

So they are right.

Practice makes perfect.

It’s been a month since we last talked.

I still miss you more than anything.

I still wish at 11:11 that you will come back.

I know you won’t but hey I’m still going to try.

I never got over you.

You’re stuck in my mind.

You made me so happy how am I meant to forget that.

Have you forgotten it?

Or do I still cross your mind like you cross mine.

Who am I kidding of course you don’t why would you.

Everyone said we we’re cute together I thought so too.

You didn’t have a reason to leave but you still did.

You promised you wouldn’t I bealived you.

I was so stupid I bealived you.

Even though you hurt me I know I will come back if you need me.

I know you still want me I see you looking at me.

I see the way you look at me.

Just come back I don’t understand why you left.

Just come back.

Love is just a four letter word these day

It used to mean something

Now It's nothing

Sex used to be making love

Now it's just for fun

I may be young but I want love

I don't want games

I don't want broken hearts

I want that four letter word that no one cares about

I want love

But I guess I will just have to learn that feelings don’t matter anymore.