lesson

Nervous energy, a childhood’s couch. No one else home, we find ourselves alone.

The thrill of danger heightens the heat of each touch, the whisper of every breath. Gasping air, like bellows fan a flame, tickles my neck. Pinpricks tiptoe down my spine with a feather-light touch, the delicate intricacy of a spider’s legs. Young and in love, craving touch, brimming with a ravenous emptiness needing to be filled.

Kiss and touch, nothing’s enough. The question posed once more, you arrive at diligent search’s end: yes.

Permission granted, jeans fall to the floor.

Long ago impure, yet still so unsure. The act the same, yet the moment as different as could be; questions swim in endless circles, my mind filled with these great pools of uncertainty as time slows like flowing molasses, my senses overwhelmed with every detail:

Where is the stench of alcohol and sweat to shock and gag me, or the slippery chill of

musty polyester to drown me, smother me, hide me away? Where is the thunderous

boom of my racing heart to deafen me, or the tunnel vision of panic to blind me?

Why does my body melt into yours, warmed by connection, dripping with pleasure?

Why am I unafraid?

Why do you kiss me, caress me, gently whisper I love you, as the curtain falls? As this moment pops like a bubble and the full scene comes back into focus with each jagged breath, I’m faced with the unexpected: your face resting contentedly on my chest, a soft smile playing at your lips, a warm tenderness filling your eyes. No rush or great hurry, no anxiety or fear to sully this sacred moment. My first lesson in love comes when you slip your hand into mine.

I found you

When I was alone and tired

I found you

When I was empty and afraid

I found you

When nothing else mattered

I found you

And the lights shone brighter

I found you

And now I am never alone

I found you

And I prayed for the first time in years

I found you

And I couldn't look away from your smile

I found you

And you found me

Over and Over again

No matter how far I ran

I found you

Beside my car

I found you

In front of my house

I found you

In my room

I found you

And you found me

A heavy old book, a dustcloud and a gust of wind. My fingers graze the soft pages

that smelled faintly of vanilla. Ouch. How can such soft pages make such a cut? A drop lands on the empty page and like a water droplet entering the still pond; it rippled. Neat lines of ink come into focus and before i knew it my lips were moving on their own. The passage read "I shall grant you evergrowing power, it will give you the strength to overcome your obstecles, defeat your enemys, win the heart of your lover, topple kings and queens alike! You will be a consistantly growing unstopable force, just like your strength. As you start to age your power will not stop growing, you will be overcome by it and driven to maddness because of it. Rejoice! for i have bestowed upon you the gift of a new life and Repay me for my kindness tenfold with that which i need." Silence. Then, screams as i felt the overwhelming strength start to course through my veins the air leaving my lungs, and my vision was blurred by red but the feeling, wasn't all that bad...