Department Fiasco
Walking around the store
You see the dress you want
You love
You desire
But
It’s a fucking size
Too small
You sigh
You didn’t have
The money anyway
But it’s so cute
You continue
Through the store
But you can’t escape
From the clutches
Of that outfit
It was everything
It was you
And you make
The terrible decision
To take it
To try it on
Ignoring the little voice in your head
Dumbass
You give in
You slip it over your head
And it’s tight
Just as you expected
But it’s so cute
And just so you
And you can’t say no
That bill that’s due in a few days
Will just have to wait
This could work
But now comes the hardest part
Parting with the dress
No, of course you’re going to buy it
But you have to get it off
In order to pay for it
You didn’t think about that
Did you?
There’s two ways
That this plays out in the movies
A mother helping her child
In a heartwarming scene
As she slips the shirt off the child
Readying him for bed
A sweet bonding moment
As she whispers
I’ll always be here for you
The other
A sexy frame in time
As you give in
Allowing him to see you
In the moonlight for the first time
Revealing your naked beauty
Because for some reason
Women in these movies
Don’t wear a bra
And you can’t tell…
He leans in for a kiss
And it warms your everything
Sadly,
You’re in neither of these situations
You’re alone
In a dressing room
Because you never
Really liked the idea of shopping
With other people
Let alone shopping at all
You can’t call for help
Because that’d be embarrassing
You should have never
Tried on the damn dress in the first place
I told you that
So you begin the
Tumultuous journey
Of wriggling out of it
And it’s over your head
Your hands stretched out
Almost there…
There’s a knock on the door
And you’re terrified
Stuck in one of the most
Compromising positions you’ve been in
Since your mother caught you
With your boyfriend at 16
Are you alright in there??
How are you supposed to
Answer that question?
You mumble a soft yes
Through the cloth of the one dress
That warmed your heart
Moments before
It’s the same feeling
You get when the waiter
Asks how your food is
While you’re still chewing
And it’s off
Finally.
You’re never going to do that again
Well… at least until next time
And before you ask,
No, I’m not sure why’d you think
I’ve ever been in that situation