Dog Talk

"Hey, Bucky! Quiet down, you're being too loud, I'm trying to watch the new Deal or no Deal. Go outside or something!" Bucky respectfully fulfilled his human's wishes by using the doggie door to travel from the living room to the backyard. Bucky sat down in the middle of the yard, closed his eyes, and began to enjoy the warm summer rays shining on his white fur.

"Hey, Loser!" The neighbor's dog barked from the next yard over. "Heh, what a loner!" Bucky continued to sit ignoring the other dog's comments. "I know you're there, I can smell you. Why are you ignoring me, Loser?"

"What do you want Cane?"

"Just for you admit that my human is better."

"Not happening."

"Why not, Loser?"

"My human cares for me way more than yours does."

"Is that a fact?"

"Yes it is."

"Prove it."

"Ok, what did your human feed you for dinner last night?"

"French fries! Beat that!"

"Heh, that's cute. Your human is trying to decrease your life span by feeding you junk food. My human brought home a roasted chicken and gave me half."

"You mean, the roasted chicken he brought over for the Fourth of July?"

"Mhmm."

"You lie!"

"Swear."

"Ugh! My human never brings home roasted chicken, all he ever really brings me is that unbearable kibble I hate so much."

"Yikes, I remember that kibble when I came over last Saturday."

"Then you know how bad it is."

"Yeah, that's ruff!"

"Don't make dog puns you Loser!"

"At least my human feeds me delicious treats!"

"Oh, you're asking for it!"

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah!"

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah!"

"Oh, yeah?"

"Stop it! We'll settle this right now!"

"How are we going to do that?"

"We're does your human let you sleep?"

"Right next to him on his bed."

"Nooooooooooo! Are you serious? That's the best spot!"

"Why, where does he make you sleep?"

"On the floor! Ugh!"

"Haha, guess you should tell me how my human is better than yours!"

"How about this, how often does he play fetch with you?"

"4 times a week."

"My human only takes me out once a week.Why I oughta...." Cane was seen running into his house barking for his human.

"Cane, whose a good boy? I can't have you in the house right now. Stay outside, ok?" Cane's human pushed Cane out the door and slammed it shut.

"Hey Cane, back so soon? How'd it go?"

"We basically talked everything through."

"Really? Cause that's not what it sounded like..."

"Ugh, just leave me alone before I pee in your yard."

"Fine, fine. I don't need you marking your territory where I sun bathe."