Morgan & Morganne

I was initially attracted to your energy before I even knew anything about you. It wasn’t a physical attraction either. Beyond that. Just a pulling sensation like a magnet.

It’s funny to me now because you were just a chubby goofball that hung out at the back of the school and ditched at lunch. But for some reason I wanted to know you.

And then of course, we end up in the same photo class. I had a total crush on you. I loved your smile and how much you didn’t care.

You gave me a ride home one day and I was so nervous the entire way.

One night after we got to know each other over random Facebook messages we all went to the jacuzzi. Me, you and her.

Of course the inevitable threesome jokes began but ha she was on her period. It was really fun at first...kissing both of our necks and turning us on...until you actually tried to have sex with her. Ew.

You came back to me when you realized she was actually serious about wanting to keep her tampon in. You slid your cock inside me before I realized it wasn’t just your fingering me anymore. I told you to stop. You didn’t. Fuck, I was horrified. Number two already. I didn’t expect it and it was too late.

After that night I’m pretty sure I hated you. You started hitting on her and ignoring me. I didn’t understand.

I was angry when I saw you but you didn’t care. Isn’t that what I liked about you in the first place?

You took something from me and gave me nothing in return.

I was embarrassed and self conscious. Why did you treat me like that?

Yesterday you gave me butterflies and now I’m sick to my stomach by the thought of you.

Then one night you call me crying. You sound like a scared little boy. I invite you over.

I told my mom you were on your way and when you arrived we ran up to my room and closed the door behind us.

You cried while I held you and I loved you so much that night. We cuddled for awhile afterwards with our hearts connected.

We had so much fun that summer. You and I. We saw each other every other day and talked for hours. About the Universe, sex, the future, humans, our mutual hatred for social norms. We got high together at least once on almost everything.

Bong rips, Kings of Leon, slow wet full body kisses up and down. Over and over.

Popping two or three Molly at the underground raves. Tripping balls and making new friends with names like Tiger and Fairy Queen.

Dropping acid and melting into the floor laughing hysterically until my dad calls and wants me to bring my car home immediately. What the fuck. I trusted you and gave you my keys and you saved the fucking day.

It had been awhile and we weren’t on great terms. Not sure why, but you pick me up and we go to a park. After a few painkillers you scored in Tijuana with your latest Tinder girlfriend we’re floating and you play me some new rap music that I dig instantly. We shared a vibe most of the time.

Then that one time I helped you get a job with the company I worked for. We locked the store up and actually did a little coke, I think it was my first time and it was so weird. And totally gross.

I realized at the point you were a loser.

Then you slept with my best friend. Maybe because I slept with yours? But you were sleeping with my girlfriend at the time. So what if she was married?

Haha so fucked. But I really loved her for some reason.

Now here we are completely disconnected. I tried, but you died a long time ago and I’ve grown out of hating everything.

The reason I was inspired to even revisit the topic of our ridiculous past together was because I dreamt of you last night. No fucking clue why but I still kind of loved you. Will you ever leave me alone?