let me get fruedian for you, my dreams consist of randomness, friends, family, hearos, music, adventure, and oddly satisfying shapes. Yet I cant piece together why you and I are so conistantly together. Or Rather why i'm always chasing after you despite the pain it brings. Last night I dreamt of all of my friends and calssmates i've ever had in my entire life. And yet all I could do was keep on searching for you. But not knowing what you are up to, not knowing whats happening, what pains transpiring, what fantasys happening. And why i'm not apart of it leaves me lost.
Why do I subconsciously torment myself with dreams of you. When I tell myself over and over I cant. I shouldnt. It will hurt if i go down that rabbit hole. Its been three months without you and I felt like I was doing good. And yet no one compares to you still.. should I even compare them to you? Are you trully worth the torment? Am I sadist?
Because I know what could potentially happen, and I know what wont happen. We spent years dreaming of a happily ever after yet we got nothing but broken bones, and heavy hearts.
So why do I dream of you still?
Do I still love you?.. probably.