Harry Situation Reviews: Doom Annihilation
Rip and tear... this movie apart piece by piece.
Doom Annihilation is a new video game movie based off my favorite video game franchise, Doom. But instead of it being released in theaters, it is released as straight-to-dvd, sparing everyone from having to buy a ticket to this crap.
Following the basic plot of the game series, the film takes place in the distant future on Mars, where the Union Aerospace Corporation (UAC) has been conducting teleportation portal experiments. And just like the games, the teleporation portals open up a gateway to the literal Hell, and all hell literally breaks loose as the staff are killed by the various demons and monsters that come through the portal. So in response, space marines are set in, along with a badass Doom Marine (played by Amy Mason, I'll get more into that later in this review), to rip and tear Hell a new asshole.
Now you all know that I love Doom. Doom is arguably the greatest video game that was ever made. There was already a Doom movie released back in 2005 and it starred Karl Urban and The Rock. Most people who've seen that film diss on it, but me personally, I enjoy it as a guilty pleasure, even if it barely resembled anything from the games. Whether anyone wanted another Doom movie is regardless because we got one anyway. That being said, as a Doom fan, you can probably understand why I really didn't care for this movie at all.
First off, this movie looks cheap as hell (no pun intended). That shouldn't be a surprise since this is a straight-to-dvd movie but they could have at least make an effort to make the film look compitant. The props, the costumes, and the sets are all what you would find from whatever leftovers they could get from an unused Battlestar Galactica set. What's worse is that there are even less monster types in this film than there were in the Doom 2005 movie. There are only two monster types: the zombies and the imps. There's also this new demon type never before seen in the franchise that was kinda cool, I guess. But it's only in one scene in the movie and that's it. For a film that's trying its damnedest to look like the games you'd think there would be more monsters. Where's the Mancubus? Where's the Pinkies? The Hell Knights? The Cacodemons? The Barons of Hell? Cyberdemon?
Fuck! They should have had fucking Cyberdemon in this movie! Where's the rest of the fucking monsters?!?!?!
They couldn't even make the monsters resemble their game counterparts. Say what you will about the 2005 movie, but at least the monsters did resemble their counterparts from Doom 3. I shouldn't be surprised given that this film already has a shoestring budget.
This film also has a major change from the series. Instead of a Doomguy, there's a Doomgal, her name being Joan Dark, who I mentioned earlier is played by an actress by the name of Amy Mason (no idea who or what she's from). They should have named her Joan Neric because of her lack of personality. Yeah, she barely expresses an emotion outside of blank void and she's got some backstory that no one's going to care about. She's not the worst thing in this movie, but she basically comes off as being super bland. Not helped that the other characters in the movie are just meat for the demons' buffet.
But there's one major issue that really stuck out. As I was watching I couldn't help but feel some sort of familiarity. Then it dawned on me half hour into the movie... the plot is Aliens. I'm serious. It's not based off Doom. It's a rip-off of Aliens. Right down to the walking up in their underwear inside sleeping pods scene, to marines being sent down to investigate what happened to an outpost, to even a scene where the pilot is killed by a scary monster. It's fucking Aliens.
The games themselves don't have much of a plot. The games are all about entering into a room full of demons and killing them all without getting killed yourself. That's it. What more could you add to that?
Now to this film's credit, despite having a Syfy Channel budget, the film is compentantly made through its directing and editing, like they were at least trying to make it a legit film. And it does make a ton of references to the games, something that was severely lacking in the 2005 movie. For example, the marines need to find key cards to unlock doors like in the games. There's a couple weapons from the games like the Super Shotgun, the BFG 9000, and even the Chainsaw. And one of the characters, Dr. Malcolm Betruger, the film's antagonist, shares the same name as the antagonist from Doom 3.
It's too bad that the BFG 9000 isn't as powerful in this movie as it is in the games. Allow me to explain: in the games, the BFG (or Big Fucking Gun) is can wipe out most if not all the demons in the room with one or two blasts. In the movie it's basically fires one round like a laser, taking out one monster at a time. Lame.
This movie was Doomed from the start. But to be fair, I was expecting to fully hate this movie. I mean the film has already given so much for me to hate. It looks really cheap, there's no characterization, the trailer didn't help promote the film, Amy Mason wrote a tweet telling fans to piss off, and the fact that id Software, the game company behind Doom, stated they had no involvement in making this film. And yet, I didn't hate it. I just didn't care for it. It's boring and a clear rip-off of Aliens.
It really is a shame that this movie had to be released because it seems that video game movies lately have been getting better. Last year featured the release of Tomb Raider (2018) and Rampage. Now both those films recieved mixed reviews from critics yet they both held at least a 50% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, higher than a majority of video game movies, and were box office success. This year featured the release of Detective Pikachu, which turned out to be a big hit for both critics and audiences. Hell, even Angry Birds 2 is said to be a huge hit and is considered better than its predecessor. Wow. We live in a world where an Angry Birds movie is considered the best video game movie. Think about that for a moment.
I do think a Doom film could work, but it cannot follow the same storyline as the games. That's where I think all video game movies fail. If there is a movie that's based off a video game, the setting should take place in the game's history rather than it's narrative. In most Doom games, its backstory is about the UAC trying to open portals on Mars and then all hell breaks loose. That should be the movie. My idea for a movie would have to take place before the events of Doom (2016), where we see the archealogical digging and teleportation experminents happening, and when all hell breaks loose, the survivors know that the only one who could potentially stop this threat is the Doom Slayer himself, who is currently asleep in his coffin. So the film becomes a race against the clock as the survivors desperately try to reach the Doom Slayer while trying to fight a losing battle against the demons and the movie ends where the games picks up.
If you're looking for a "good Doom movie", I don't know, check out Event Horizon sometime. Just not this film.
Positives:
-Some game references
-Compentant enough
Negatives:
-Boring as hell
-Super cheap
-Joan Neric
-Rip-off of Aliens
-Just another video game movie
Final Grade: D-
So those are my thoughts on Doom Annihilation. The lesson here is this: if you're making a sequel don't put 'annihilation' in the title (I'm looking at you Mortal Kombat: Annihilation).
Best Quote:
Akua: "I'm your ultra nightmare, motherfuckers!"
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