Genesis

Adam was perfect, right?

God stretched out his big finger,

warned him directly about the Tree.

So Adam knew better than to indulge

in Forbidden Fruit.

Of course, it seemed so unfair--

the tree's resplendence was blinding.

Adam was weary with pacing,

shielding his eyes as he stared,

salivating as he said to himself:

“Adam, be strong; don’t give in.

You eat it, you die.”

And then here comes Eve-

her perfect titties hanging out,

forbidden sugar on her breath,

nectar trickling down her chin.

Adam want to pounce,

lick the sinful juice of her body;

but he remained resilient to his God.

Except, when Eve turned to strut away,

her fine ass swayed sensually.

Adam just couldn't say no to booty,

indulged in sweet flesh.

And they were being watched.

Angels, in their great celestial domain,

got a glimpse of naked-ass Eve.

They looked around Heaven inquisitively

and pondered bitterly:

“We are divine, damn it.

Why does a silly garden get such fine booty?”

So the angels clawed off their halos,

ripped off their wings,

hurled themselves to Earth.

And that is why I quit reading the Bible.

Genesis told me all I need to know.

Your ass is better than Heaven.