732
Our number
Days I’m older
Days I’ve missed you
When this was a pebble, no boulder
I wanted to slow the roll
Prevent what this has come to
I just can’t find the words
I just wish we had a redo
It’s fucked, my head spins
I don’t feel like your brother, your next of kin
I know I can’t say the right things
I’ve never been able to communicate
My words of sincerity, come out as hate
I just want to convey
How I feel
Whatever I mean
This hands deserves a redeal
My intention is to extend a branch off of my tree
But instead I point the barrel back at me
A chalk outline on the floor of a crime scene
I care so much
We grew so much in a year and a half
I didn’t give you the advice you needed, deserved
That hurts me more than the charlie horse in my calf
I thought they were just words
But i fucked us, split us in thirds
It’s not regret, but acceptance
It wasn’t just the things you did and said
This feeling of sludge and repentance
Is of what I didn’t do, didn’t say
I took it personal
I shouldn’t have
Looked away
My tunnel vision kept my eyes on the road
From what truly mattered
It’s not your fault
You were hurt, offended
A heart battered
But I kept driving
Turned the blame away
And I’m so sorry
I live with it every single day
I’m trying to stay on your level
Talk to you in a way you’ll get me
Hear me for what I really mean
I just want you to see
I’m not talking down to you
I just want us to be once again 2 of 3
I know I’m an asshole
But I promise, I’m here, with you
Not on a high horse locked in a castle
I don’t know if it’ll ever be the same
But that’s ok
I just want, one day
A picture of us in the same frame