Surviving Epstein
I can feel his warm, tequila stained breath on my neck as each individual hair stands up in defense. I close my eyes and take a breath. Just one more hour, hang in there, I reassure myself. His sausage-like index finger traces the line in the back of my neck. My chest clogs, and I gulp frivlously to keep from vomiting. His very touch makes my skin crawl as I imagine it did for all the girls he's touched before. I open my eyes and look in his direction. He grins menacingly, like Pennywise the clown about to claim yet another victim. Every part of my body aches to kick him in his tiny balls and jump out of the plane without a parachute, but I resist the urge and manage to flash him my best smile. You've got a great smile, he says, transferring his dry wrinkled hands onto my face, you ever think about modeling? I want to bite his fingers off, but I gently brush his hand off my face and say, No, never occurred to me before. Thank you.
I sink further back into my seat, attempting to keep as much distance between us as possible, but he's persistent, as expected. His hand is now on my inner thigh. My eye catches the flight attendants' who are watching us, as though waiting for what usually comes next. One of them approaches us, like she saw the look of disgust and fear in my eyes, and says, Can I get you guys anything to drink? Before he can decline, I ask for a glass of champagne. God knows I could use alcohol right now. Mr. Epstein, for you? he looks at me and smiles. Make that two. We deserve a toast, he says taking his hand even further up now. I clear my throat and excuse myself to the restroom. Don't be too long, he says after me.
I look at myself in the mirror and splash cold water onto my face. My green eyes are blood-shot from lack of sleep and stress. I can't do this, I think, what was I thinking agreeing to this when the police asked me to cooperate? There's a knock on the bathroom door. Are you alright in there? I suddenly have flashes to the bathroom scene in The Shining. Get yourself together, I tell myself.
Fine, I'm fine. I'll be right out, I yell. I take one last look in the mirror and take a deep breath like it may be my last. You've got this. Not long now. I slide the lock on the bathroom door and let myself out. I fix my dress and make my way back to my seat where he's waiting with both champagnes in hand. I missed you, he says handing me my champagne. I grin, I'm here now, I say. Yes, you are, he says placing his hand back on my inner thigh. Drink up, he winks at me. I take the glass close to my mouth, but quickly stop. How am I to know that he didn't spike this drink? Everything okay? he says.
Yes, yeah. It's great. I have to think fast. I just- I put on my best clumsy act and spill the drink all over him. Oh crap, I'm so sorry, I say, but he's quick to reassure me as he begins unbuttoning his shirt as the flight attendant makes her way back with another shirt. Don't worry about it, he says taking my hand and putting it on his bare, wrinkly chest. I clench my jaw in an attempt to keep myself from gagging. Mr. Epstein, here's another shirt, the flight attendant says. Thank you, he says taking the shirt and freeing my hand from his clutches. The flight attendant eyes me in an Are you okay? manner. I nod, smiling, but I am far from okay. I look at my watch. Only thirty minutes until we land.
Somewhere to be? he asks me as he buttons up his new shirt and hands his stained one to the flight attendant. I giggle. No, of course not. He buttons his last button and cuddles closer to me. He brushes my hair and tucks a stray piece behind my ear. Don't worry about the time, let's just enjoy each other's company. His lips brush my neck and my body immediately tenses up. You smell so good, he whispers in my ear. I humor him for a minute, but gently push him off. Are you okay? he asks. Yes, yeah. Just a bit nauseous. I haven't eaten today. His face falls, disappointed his advances failed for the time being. He quickly picks himself up. I wouldn't want you to pass out, let's get you some food. He calls over the other flight attendant. Please bring the lady the best sandwich we've got. The flight attendant nods. Thank you, I whisper.
His hand touches the small of my back and gently massages it. Thankfully, the flight attendant hastily brings me a wrapped turkey sandwich leaving no time for any more advancements. Thank you so much, I say as I grab the sandwich from her hands. Jeffrey looks at me as I slowly unwrap the sandwich and draw it close to my mouth. He licks his lips as he watches me take a bite. I watch his chest rise and fall a bit faster than normal. I focus on eating as slowly as humanly possible, and he seems to be eating it up. Good? he says. Mhm, I mumble with a mouth full of food. God, you're beautiful, he says. I smirk, using eating as an excuse to not verbally respond.
Mr. Epstein? The captain would like to see you for a moment, the flight attendant interrupts. Thank God, I think. Excuse me for a moment, he says. I nod as he leaves. I look at my watch again. I'm nearly done with my sandwich, and I've wasted a good twenty minutes doing so, which means we'll be landing any minute now. I take the last bite when he returns to his seat. Captain says to buckle up, we'll be landing soon. I nod handing over the remaining wrapper to the flight attendant. All better? he asks. Yes, I say, much. Good, I'm glad, he says brushing his finger across my lip. You had a mustard stain, I got it. I didn't, but I let it slide. He smirks, displaying all of his teeth like he's ready to ravage me. The pilot's voice comes over the intercom. We will be landing shortly, flight attendants and passengers please buckle up. I sigh in relief. Better hang on tight, he says as he grabs my hand and brushes it with his thumb. I clutch the armrests tightly as we begin to descend.
After what seems like an eternity, we finally reach the ground. Jeffrey tells me to hang back as he goes to speak with the Pilot. I look around frantically in search of the police, praying that they'll infiltrate the plane quicky, but nothing. I watch the flight attendants and pilot exit. Jeffrey notices the look of confusion on my face. I thought we could hang back and finish what we started. My heart sinks and the sandwich is quickly making its way back up. Um, maybe another time Jeffrey-, but he doesnt let me finish. No better time than now, he says as he picks me up and caresses my face. He begins kissing my neck. Stop, please stop, I say, but he won't budge. He pushes my back against the wall, and I struggle to push him off. Oh God, where the hell are they? I think. Tears drop like waterfalls on my face as I plead for him to stop. Stop being a little bitch, you know you want this, he says, his hand now creeping up my shirt onto my breast as he squeezes it roughly. I fight to get away, but he pushes me further into the wall. I groan. Please, I cry, Please stop. Nothing. I start to lose hope, slowly descending into my own mind to avoid being present. But, just as I am gone completely, I hear them. Jeffrey Epstein, you are under arrest, let the girl go and put your hands in the air. Just then, with his pants around his ankles, Jeffrey pushes himself off of me and raises both hands above his head, shamefully facing his fate.
I watch as they take him out, he looks back at me with betrayal and hatred in his eyes. I lose myself completely as I sob uncontrollably. Where were you? I scream, as a female officer comes to console me with a warm blanket and water. I take small sips trying to regain my composure. I want to wash myself in an acid bath in any attempt to wash his stench off of me, but I know it'll never be enough. His musky, cologne heavy scent will forever stain my nostrils.