why I write
I write out the memories, so I wont forget
I made a promise, I don’t regret
Almost every day before you moved to baltimore
You asked me never to forget, and I promised and I swore
So when you passed away the promise took new meaning
For some time I failed because I was deeply grieving
But now I'm ready to be brave and share your story with the world
So if you read carefully, I will share the story of a girl
I miss your hand on my shoulder
You were always the one who was boulder
I wish your hand was in mine so we could face this together
You were the rock, I was the feather
You held me down to earth, and in place
I was fragile, full of grace
You were sturdy, immovable thing
That was, until you moved away from me
You kept making me promise never to forget you
It was an obsession that did not beset you
But every single time you asked, I promised on my life
And when you passed away, it twisted in the knife
Some of me wished to forget, put the promise to rest
Most of me wanted to honor you, and your last wish
I thought about cutting you name into my skin
I could never get up the nerve to plunge the knife in
People kept hugging me, or offering to talk with me
I always politely declined, I was not ready
I found resolve in writing what I was feeling
At first it was just jumbles of anguish and grieving
But eventually I started writing out her story
The story only I can tell, in her memory
I am graduating today
And your hand should be in mine
We always planned this day together
We swore we would not cry
We always said, on the very last day of school
We would say what we really think of everyone
But now without you here
I can't do it alone
I can't speak my mind freely
That was always your specialty
You would always give me that boost of confidence I needed
We always thought we would graduate together
And after, we would have a sleepover
We always thought you would live to see this day
But i'm standing on this stage alone
Because you left this world in may
And im graduating without my best friend