What It is Like to Me
I have a secret admirer. Unfortunately, I can't say too much. He is lovely. We met through unauthorized channels I won't reveal. This man has the authenticity I have been looking for.
However, he does not live here. Still, I want to see him and have professed my feelings for him. I know he is authentic. Let me tell you, it is nice about being hurt and being cheated on to have an admirer such as this man.
Tests complicate love in the time of coronavirus, on and off flights, borders, and fluctuating daily circumstances. I sense on the street a kind of pandemic spring fever. Men have walked up to me and offered their hand, wanting more. It is kind of flattering and somewhat awkward.
I have never been a forward person this way. You will find me at the back of a nightclub or concert, not at the front. I do not dance around. I usually stop, take note, sing along, and listen. People probably classify me as a sociable introvert.
My suspicions are that my introversion is why I get attention. I am not the type to cheat or lie. I am not prettier than those girls at the front. However, any beauty I have is natural. My looks are hardly feigned or artificial. I suspect some men, having experienced hurt by certain ladies with agendas, like me for this reason.
Still, I have had a hard time in love, like anyone else. I used to feel sorry for myself. Now I appreciate what I have. The past doesn't matter that much. Put into perspective, those people were inconsiderate. They left my life for a reason.
Everything I have been through has educated me up to this point. I now see the reason I have been through what I have been through. That experience has prepared me for this next journey. If you don't believe in love or predestination, you should.