There are voices whispering and shouting in my ear

the grim reaper behind the teacher.

I want it all to stop.

The voices.

So I could focus.

There are more coming; growing.

The panic is rising in my chest and I don’t know how to ask for help.

I want it all to stop.

I couldn’t disrupt the class.

The whispers of

“hey that kid in Chemistry is crazy” and

“She should be put away” and

“She's crazy, who would want to be friends with her?”

It’s not my fault.

I didn’t ask to be like this.

I can’t ask for help,

that would turn into a yell,

a shout,

a scream.

That would disrupt the class.

I’d get in trouble, kicked out.

My thoughts are spiraling, I just want it all to stop.

Make it stop.

Leave me be,

Let me have peace.

Isn’t that a basic human right?

To be at peace?

But the voices and the ghosts.

They’re in my ear and in the room and behind me and front of me and

Why won’t they leave me alone?

I raise my hand

“Can I go to the nurse?”

“The nurses can’t help you”

“The others can see the crazy”

“It’s written on your forehead can’t you see?”

“You stupid creature”

“You’re a disruption”

I wish the voices would shut up.

The grim reaper follows me

He stands with me by the nurse

“He’ll hurt you”

“Don’t trust the nurse”

“The pills are poison”

“Don’t trust, not trust”

“You got sent home, now look at what you’ve done!”

I take the pills my mother gives me

Despite the voices.

“You’re poisoning your body,”

I’m used to the voices by now

But that doesn’t make them less scary

I wish it did.

Sometimes I wish,

Most of the time I wish,

All the time I wish,

I could hide from my mind.

In the darkest corners of the globe

Where it can't find me.

Where it doesn't tell me I'm crazy

Where it doesn't say I'm going mad.

Where I can just be.