She
Right now she is not a brave heart
captivating the beauty surrounding her
Nor, is she the gleaming light who walks in the room
She is the thunderstorm screaming with a glimpse of hope that a rainbow would form in the choas
She is the darkness of night waiting for the sun to rise to be painted with light
She is the waves in the tide, the emotions washing ashore
She is trying to get a hold of her old self of who she was before
Before grief immersed her soul
Illuminated only darkness of the evolution of who’d she became with losing the ones she loved
suddenly she had lost control
The worries that fill her mind as big as the ocean
She is learning to be at peace and laugh through all of the commotion
She is filled with uncertainty that life is fleeting before her eyes
She rather work to the point of destruction as if the busy keeps her from feeling that her life painted with pretty lies.
She is stuck behind a rock holding her back and a mountain
ready to climb.
The dreams to travel but yet settle down.
However, she has the fear of being left behind
She is me. The person I am looking in the mirror.
The reflection of her past and present self of who she wants to stare at in the future
If she can look past her fears and the defeat she is facing
She will soon realize that all of the setbacks that have brought her here will be worth embracing
She is grateful but hardened
She will rise up again from all of her bargains
So she will look up to God for guidance and not fear the future
She will surrender and not let her worries consume her
She is learning. Learning to grow into this new version of herself that once was broken to become somewhat beautiful
She only hopes that others will give her a little grace during this storm she bares
She is trying hard to be that great friend, sister and family member that everyone knew before her despairs
Maybe I am the only one who is missing the me I used to be.
She is me.