one breath

my parents and my teachers and my coach said

go home and ready

prepare to move

and let the air mix into your lungs–

then, you will be free.

i wonder, how hard could it be?

i am a child, untouched, baby-fat and loose limbs

i slip through, in-out, around, testing the tug,

and i rush against the wall, rough shock to my palms

and i burn, burn, burn, fire in my blood and my air

what does it mean to sweat and tread

medalless, joyless, friendless, pain-full?