Dad Jokes

At the dinner table trading jokes

Dad went first, pun after punch line

We'd try to stay calm but always broke

Into bursts of reluctant lettuce laughter

  What do you call a grizzly with no teeth?

  A gummy bear

      Hahaha

  Why did the banana go to the doctor?

  He wasn’t peeling well

      Hahaha

      What’s brown and sticky?

      A stick!

      Hahaha

Firefighters, police officers, and public servants

Came to my elementary school to teach us

Safety protocols. I turned left

To greet a passing cop and walked

Into a cement support beam.

It’s funny now.

   Why was six afraid of seven?

   Because seven eight nine

      Hahaha

      I want to write poetry

   Hahaha

   I had a dream I was awake

   But when I woke up,

   I was asleep

      Hahaha

It was a silly dream

      I’m going to cure cancer

   Hahaha

   What do you call an alligator in a vest?

   An investigator

      Hahaha

   Where do you drown a hipster?

   In the mainstream

      Ha

      What time is it?

   Time to get a watch

   Hahaha

I leave my dishes in the sink

On top of the other dishes.

When I leave the room,

He asks why –

      I’m tired

   Hi, Tired

   I'm Dad