Self-motivation: trial and error
"Life begins with a BANG!" He slamed his half drank coffee on the table full of breadcrumbs and coffee stains.
"...A what? You mean a gunshot?" Someone asked
"That's how life ends you idiot! Ahem. It's nothing, I just feel so unexpectedly motivated today" He sipped from his mug with satisfaction.
"Wow...I can't help but still be utterly surprised by how utterly pathetic those words are" An exasperated voice replied.
"You! Dare be an offensively pessimist again in front of this humble me and see how those words will bite you!" He tried to maintain his hold of the mug while showing his confidence for his words.
"Say that again when you wake up 8 hours early, your bed clean without any molds, your sink not stinking of rotten poop, your ceiling without cobwebs, your house not enshrouded by dust and thick curtains. And...that's just the general shit of it!" The voice filled the dark room without any delay.
"Hey at least I'm trying here!" The man jump from his chair filled with spiderwebs and dust as he vehemently stared at the silhouette in front of him.
"WELL YOU AIN'T TRYING HARD ENOUGH!" The voice shouted across the room in deep contempt.
"SHUT UP! GET A LIFE FIRST YOU PIECE OF SHIT!" The man carelessly dropped his mug on the garbage-stained floor and grabbed the cracked mirror patched with tape and glue across the table sitting on another chair, and threw it in the living room. As he forcefully shouts another phrase.
"GO TALK SHIT ABOUT YOURSELF!"