Friday Night at the Engineers’ Lounge
Good luck, Mate. You're wasting your time trying to get a rise out of Bingham... he's in la-la land. The poor wanker--three spliffs of catnip and clover and you can toss a pat of butter on him 'cause he's basically a baked potato. Nah, if you want to achieve the impossible, you'll do better to ask Green, over there, anyway. Buy him a coffee--tall--if you want his attention. Green's a legend. A Frenchman asked him, once, to brew up a jig to allow his one-armed daughter to scale El Capitan in Yosemite. Two months later, she posted pics of herself at the top, blessing the skies at the feet of a double rainbow--it went viral. You'll need a certain degree of luck, and a lot of green to get him on your team. Trust me on the tall brew, though. Off you go then. Hey, give Bingham a pat on the shoulder for me--just a little jig--yeah. Hey! Bingham! Snap to it, man! It's the legend! Right now! The Great Rogue Potato Chip is lost in the pillows somewhere on the green sofa beside you! You have to find it before the sea turtles slide down the rainbow into an oblivion of red clover! And they're doing it without the Queen's blessing! Hurry, man! The turtles! Think about the turtles!