No; How!? Know-how.
A temperate rush of blood through my veins
is spiking my pulse.
My heart thundering thuds in waves that are muted by my ribcage...
This feeling is fear.
Sudden trepidation as if I’m grasping out in thin air,
stepping timidly to what's unknown.
Teetering on unsure, I’m prone to need to be reassured. I am cautious as I go at a stolid pace. I had been wandering for so long in this place before it happened.
I had been wondering the points I felt were eluding me. Those points missing in my answers for existing realistically, and I was dead wrong when I kept insisting that I wanted answers given to me for my questioning.
I found the truth to be a sharp chill, enveloping and cracking me, at the end to my curiosity. Now my only defense against this cold was the innocence of my younger view that was the best of me, lost too soon.
If only I'd known naivety whilst within it, Id have know I was being pursued by such harsh truth and perhaps I could have avoided this minute of untimely realization.
Time is an adroit foe, no fare-weather friend, and it is in it's shadow that my glowing nescience flickers, and fades to black..
Devoid of this precious glimmer, the deep dim of the scene I'm seeing is setting grim my view and fading out that which I now lack. Much like a dream I once had, only I want to forget this idea as a last grasping breath of this unbeknownst grace gone bad.
I’m more aware now, as by terror and dread I am seized. Clutching my chest, fist to my heart, my face is weaved with a tightened grimace. I slowly sway on my feet.
It feels like a loss, like a menacing release. What I imagine the departure of my beings quintessence would be, but that didn’t happen and I fell to bent knee. I’m a mass that's hollow and at a loss, but honestly I was sated.
I am not proud now, just asphyxiated, and that is why I cannot speak, but tell me..
If knowledge really is power, then why do I feel weak