I know how to speak
This is a good thing I do for you. This song means so many things at different times. It reminds me to let go of my shame. It reminds me that I have been here, wherever here may be, before. And it tells me to go back and look at my training. You see when I was little the sky was just as big for me as it was for anyone else. I dreamed of a family I never had and perhaps, never will. I got distracted you see. I was too young. Now. Now I'm on the wrong side of life yet still I live. It was all a mirage, a vapor before me that's now no more and I wish so much to look behind me. I want to live in the past because he's not in my present nor my future. I saw him come into this world. I should never have seen the things I've seen. I need to know he knew. I look for me but I'm not here. I feel for me but a phantom pain is all I sense. I laugh hollow and brief with a remembrance that I don't deserve it. This song helps someway I can't explain but I can share it with you. It's I KNOW HOW TO SPEAK by Manchester Orchestra. They have a few others that are ethereal to me their song THE SILENCE is a powerful song unlike any other. I think you'll like them.