Time spent

Time Spent

It is too late. It is too late.

If only I could express to you one more time

How much I really love you.

If only there were stairs to heaven,

Id rise up -

Sit with you one more time.

It is too late. It is too late.

So much time was spent on your porch

Observing yellow, orange, pink ascending from the horizon.

So much time was spent watching birds.

So much time was spent gardening all the plants you adored.

Now, it is too late. It is too late.

So much time was spent painting rocks out on the patio.

So much time was spent making birdhouses.

So much time was spent

sleeping on your living room floor in your old tee-shirts.

So much time was spent telling stories, listening to your’s - Tuning some out.

It is too late. It is too late.

So much time was spent camping and mushroom hunting.

So much time was spent loving.

Time is out.

It is too late.

If only I could tell you how much your lessons

Stuck to me like the gorilla glue you’d use for crafts.

If only I could tell you how I am feeling now.

So much time is spent

Swimming through an ocean of regrets.

If only we were closer before the clock stopped ticking.

If only I could have stopped over more.

If only I could have seen your smile,

At their birthdays, at my wedding, just anywhere.

As long as I could see you. It is too late.

If only the clock hadn’t stopped.

If only I called more.

If only I wasn’t stubborn.

If only I wasn’t busy All. Of. The. Time.

If only I had apologized

Instead of holding my breath under the water.

If only I forgave.

I am drowning.

So much time was spent ignoring.

So much time is spent feeling like I am a fish,

Swimming through an ocean,

All of the sharks trying to eat me.

This is regret. Now it is too late.

It is too late.

The clock has stopped.

If only I could sit next to you,

Verse One-More-Time,

How much I really love you.