Her True Self...
To a writer, staying away from your craft even for a day can make him or her feel like ages have passed. Thus, it was no different for Adella when she finally entered and sat down at her white desk and chair in her sunroom after a year of abandonment.
As she sat there, staring at the blank page in front of her, in a space where creativity usually flowed out of her effortlessly, this time it triggered no response and the words just wouldn't come no matter how hard she'd try.
It had been like this for the past year. Ever since she had started dating Malik, her writing had taken a backseat. At first, she didn't mind it. She was in love and she thought that was all that mattered. But as time went on, she realized that the relationship was in fact "bad news," a quote by her younger and older sister both, who could never really agree on anything except that they could never understand how she could choose to become a writer after spending years studying to become a doctor. According to them, the pay just isn't the same. Nonetheless, this should have tipped her off on what a red flag this relationship with Malik was and the severity of its toll on her once budding creativity. Unfortunately, it never did until much later on.
This all started after an incident where she had been at the center of discussion by the online community where she would often interact with fans of her novels and short stories. However, a few comments struck her where it hurt and stuck with her as they mentioned her biological clock ticking and her dating life or lack thereof needing a major update from the first love she once knew in her teens.
She was open with her fans so that they knew this much and more about her life so needless to say that when she met Malik, and told them that she had begun a new relationship, they were thrilled that she was starting something new.
But what they didn't know about and neither did Adella at the time, was Malik's true personality. He was charming, handsome, and seemingly perfect on their fancy restaurant dates. But behind closed doors, he was actually controlling, manipulative, and emotionally abusive. It started off with small things, like criticizing her writing and making her doubt her abilities which made her, as she soon realized, distance herself from her love of writing. But as their relationship progressed, it turned into constant put-downs and gaslighting. She was always walking on eggshells, never knowing what would set him off, and what he would criticize her more on next...her weight, her height, her laugh maybe?
She tried to talk to him about it, but he would always turn it around on her saying that she was too sensitive or overreacting. She didn't want to lose him, so she believed his words and stayed with him even though she endured and would continue to endure constant emotional turmoil.
But as the months went by, she started to feel suffocated. She missed her old self, the one who would sit for hours and pour her heart out onto the pages. She missed the feeling of being lost in her writing, of creating something beautiful. She realized that she couldn't continue like this, sacrificing her passion for a toxic relationship.
Finally, after a year of constant turmoil, she mustered up the courage to end things with Mark. It wasn't easy, but she knew it was the right thing to do for herself and for her love of writing. As she walked away from him, she felt a weight lifted off her shoulders. She was free from the chains of his manipulation and control.
As she sat down to write again, she felt a surge of inspiration. The words flowed seamlessly like unbothered streams of water, as though they were trapped inside her for so long, waiting to be set free. Adella set her sights on beginning and completing a new novel. One that took her weeks then months to write but gave her an opportunity to communicate with her audience and her fans about her pain, her struggles, and her journey to freedom.
She poured her heart out onto the pages, and with each word, she felt a sense of healing. With each chapter, she realized again and again that she was stronger than she ever thought possible.
As her writing gained recognition and her words resonated with others, she knew that she had made the right decision. She was no longer in a bad relationship, and she was no longer sacrificing her passion for someone who didn't appreciate her. She had found her voice again, and she was using it to inspire and empower others.
Looking back, she couldn't believe that she had let someone else control her and her passion for so long. But she also knew that the experience had not been in vain because it made her stronger and more resilient. She was grateful for the lessons she had learned, and she was determined to never let anyone dim her light again or her faith.
As she closed her laptop, she felt a sense of closure. She had finally let go of the past and was ready to move forward, with her writing and her faith by her side. She smiled, knowing that she had found her way back to her true self, and she would never lose herself again to please or keep someone else.