Inner Space: A Work in Progress

The space inside of our minds can be very turbulent at times.

We might dwell within an argument that we had with a friend: Reliving it over and over. With each replay the argument becomes more bitter and the divide between friends becomes wider.

We might anticipate an upcoming conflict with a colleague, or maybe an upcoming presentation. The event hasn’t even happened yet. But, we’ve been stuck in traffic, the slideshow that we so carefully prepared has disappeared from our hard drive, and a jelly donut has exploded on our shirt.

These negative alternate realities are just delusions. But, we dwell in them just like we dwell in the physical world. They can, and do impact our perception of “reality“, and our life in the physical world. It‘s pretty amazing, and unfair, considering that we don’t even eat jelly donuts!

How do we counteract these inhospitable places with their uncomfortable furniture, painfully bright fluorescent lighting, and exploding donuts?

We create other alternate realities that are just as delusional, but in an impossibly positive way.

How many times have we dreamed of the perfect vacation? We live that vacation many times over in our mind before even boarding the flight. Inevitably, we arrive and find the water less blue, the locals less friendly, and the sheets much scratchier than they were in our mind.

So, what’s to be done?

I’ve been working on constructing a space within. The space will be comfortable, but no more comfortable than my chair at home. It will be quiet, but no quieter than my neighborhood at 4 AM.

Many of my favorite things will be there. But, they will be things that are readily accessible to me in my daily life: singing birds, a good book, inspiring words, sunshine, snowfall, or a hot bath.

Absent will be deadlines and donuts, perfect sunrises, and soft sandy beaches. Absent will be stress, anger, bitterness, and elation.

It will be a neutral space. But, it must also be a space of gratitude and humility. When I inhabit the space I will be grateful, as the simplest of pleasures that I listed above are not available to everyone. I will be humble, as pleasures, even simple ones, must never be taken for granted.

I’ve been constructing this neutral space within for quite some time. But, suddenly, I’ve silenced the hammers and saws. I’ve joyfully paid the workers a big bonus, and sent them home early to play with their children.

I‘ve realized that I need not construct this third delusional inner world. I need only open my blinds, open a book, go for a walk, or go run a bath. If I do any of these things with gratitude and humility in my heart I’ll have no need to dwell anywhere but the present moment.