THE SECRETS BETWEEN US

After having a few drinks with my buddies, I walked into our hotel room expecting you to be asleep; after all you had a lengthy day and by the evidence of bags I observed in the room earlier, shopping had taken up the majority of it. The room we shared was not particularly fancy, but it did contain an astounding white porcelain tub for two, enclosed by clear tempered glass. This phenomenal bathroom stood in the middle of the room. I staggered into the room and was surprised by the lights being on. The two queen sized beds were on the same side of the room a mere distance between them. Night stands separated the beds and there was enough walking span around them but the space itself was quite small. The yellow walls held a clock and a pair of landscape paintings. Our room overlooked the pool, however the lights from outside did not radiate all the way through the windows since the bamboo blinds were drawn. As my gaze lingered on your bed I was utterly astounded to see your nakedness lying on the blue satin sheets. Your perfectly rounded ass exposed, your black thong peeking through. I was captivated, I stood in silence as my eyes traced every inch of your curves. I wondered for a moment if the proper gesture would be to sheath you, however the closeness that had to be involved would bring about another sort of temptation, so I left you alone. This entire experience was mind blowing, confusion overwhelmed me. I wanted so badly to embrace your bareness and ravish every inch of your smooth perfection. I felt myself grow hard and as I placed my hands on my crotch I couldn’t help but squeeze away the desires I felt at that moment. My eyes remained fixed on you, your bare skin alluring, your position vulgar and inviting as you lay on your stomach with your hips elevated, your right leg spread out and up to your stomach, as your left leg dangled off the edge of the bed. This was torture! I licked my lips frequently; it was as though I tasted your sweetness in every tongue stroke. I placed my hands onto my head, then over my face willing the image away, but you didn’t move a muscle. Instead I could see the slight rise and fall of your body as you lay there gently breathing, enjoying your slumber.

I took the lights off, and then slowly and carefully moved closer to your bed, then at hands reach I stopped, and sat on mine. I looked away filling my mind with everything and anything avoiding the thoughts of you. It worked for a while; with you sleeping I undressed and got under the covers, my erection bursting through my boxers. I felt ashamed, and willed myself to sleep but it did not work. The buzz I felt kept me uneasy, irritable as I lay in bed angled in your direction, looking directly at you. I couldn’t help it any longer, I had fought as hard as I could and while I never took notice of you in this way prior to tonight, your sexy bare skin had me fantasizing, wanting you. I was repulsed by my actions but my weakness grew stronger. I released my thoughts, and allowed the feeling of being inside you to take control of my mind and body, as I lay looking at you, my penis in hand; I masturbated… I knew the entire act was erroneous however I was truly unable to escape it.

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I was hoping you came into the room when you did; I purposefully exposed myself, eager for you to have me. I’ve felt this way about you for the past couple years, but I was disappointed. I’ve wanted you for so long and when you told me you were going to have some drinks with the guys, I knew it would be the perfect time to seduce you. You would blame it on the alcohol and I would have had you. I could never look into your eyes and express my feelings, I was brought up with the principle of knowing my place as a woman, and it was definitely not to make the first move where men were concerned. I didn’t need you looking at me as though I was desperate, because I was not. I completely understood your hesitation but I had also seen you looking at me.

I distinctively remembered last summer, it was the first time you saw me in my tight, denim shorts, the ones with the black paws printed on the back pockets with the tiny hem, which rested just under my butt cheeks. I had worn them at Shem’s beach party; my girlfriends had all told me that the shorts were so tight my pegs were showing. I could not have relayed to them that I knew, and that I wanted it to show since I was trying to get your attention. The seam of the pants was rubbing against my clit, and it had created a unique and breath-taking sensation which I welcomed. While I looked at you in the distance, I fantasized that the feeling was essentially you satisfying me. When we interacted I felt sexy; I wanted you then and even more so as time has-been, my longing for you has significantly increased.

As adults the decision depends on us, our desires, and our secrets, they would forever remain concealed; the attraction and passion I know we share should be explored. You had the perfect opportunity but you chose to evade the obvious by masturbating…why? I was awake; I knew you looked at me while you touched yourself. I heard your moans and your heavy breathing. I saw you climax and I wanted so badly to turn over, open my legs and give myself to you, but I could not bring myself to doing it, not then. I was not sure of how you would react with me, seeing you under those circumstances. Consequently, I chose to lay silent while I enjoyed your random act of passion. I fantasized and the moistness between my legs increased, as I subtly enjoyed the moment with you. I only wished we were able to share it together, however I would never give up; I cannot, because my craving for you is insatiable.

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When I woke up I did not immediately recall my sins of the night before, not until I saw you. I was nauseated by my body’s impulsive reaction to you, this was heart wrenching. You wore a white sheer see through nightgown; I could see the black thong, the one I was crippled to last night as you moved about the room. My eyes covertly followed your every move as the nightmare came to life. I was lying in bed hoping you would not recognize that I was awake but you did, and as you walked over to me, I felt the guilt, heavy, weighing down on me. I sat up, closed my eyes for just a moment, and took in a deep breath while trying to recover my strength, and to win control of the overpowering lust and perversion that I was battling. I had to overcome this quandary, and so with the best intention I stood up, ready to face the day.

You brought me breakfast and we sat together, the blinds were opened and we casually talked about the day ahead. I was able to stay focused throughout our meal, but I continually kept my eyes out the window as I looked at the staff on the pool deck, I would slightly glance back at you while avoiding eye contact. When our meal came to an end and the day followed its due course, it became easier. I had been able to look at you and have a conversation without any distractions. After all, I am quite convinced that I had way too much alcohol last night, and my hang over this morning had definitely contributed to the unfortunate happenings. My most recent, peculiar behaviour was in the past, and I was delighted to move forward, leaving it behind, my secrets never to be told and hopefully to hastily forget.

With my sudden burst of confidence, I got dressed and headed to the pool. I was not a conceded individual but I knew my physique caused an attraction with the ladies. I was 5’ 9”with a slender muscular built, an ethnic mix of African and Caucasian gave me an eye-catching appearance. I had a straight nose, a sharp jaw line with hazel brown eyes and golden brown curly hair. My tanned complexion was luminous in the sunlight, as I walked around the pool. The black trunks I wore hugged every part of my midsection, with the towel over my right shoulder it brushed against the brown curly hairs on my chest. I felt excellent as I took in a deep breath; I exhaled slowly then pulled the shades down off my head and unto my face. I sat on the edge of the pool and dangled my feet in the water as I enjoyed the fresh air, beautiful weather and ambiance at the hotel.

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We only have two more days at this hotel. I will never have the opportunity to be this close to you again, not without anyone else in our presence. Sharing a room with you and sleeping so close to you at night. This was marvelous, I will certainly never get over it; frustration would take control if it does not happen before we leave. I must bring myself to express the feelings I hide, because my love for you is overwhelmingly passionate. Words cannot express how much I love you or explain the depths of my desires, the erotic fantasies and hunger I hold for you are endless. When I am next to you and our skin touch, even if it’s for a brief moment, the warmth and smoothness of your skin causes an agitation within me. My legs jitters in anticipation, the enthusiasm boils as my body reacts to your faint gestures. I can tell that you are attempting to ignore this, why won’t you allow it? To permit the unspoken love and erotic desires to take its natural course; you must be willing to unleash the reservations that dwell within you.

I won’t tell a soul, I promise… make love to me!

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I saw you in the distance, attractive and enticing in your floral bikini, I stared at you through the lens of my shades. Relieved that I was wearing them, and to be honest this was the very first time I really looked at you. I started from your curly tresses that bounced about your shoulders when you walked; I looked at your beautiful face bright with youth and cheer, as the little dimples in your cheeks deepened when you smile. I was oblivious to how attractive you were, your caramel toned skin was so appealing, your lusciously pink lips curved perfectly and you had the smallest hands and feet. Your curves stood out as I continued staring at you, after a while I wanted to look away but couldn’t. I hid behind the darkness of the shades, taking in your sexiness with every stride and motion of your body. I took the towel off my shoulder, and placed it on my lap to conceal my erection. I continued tracing you with my eyes, as you got closer to me, my heart raced, the thoughts that terrorized me grew stronger than ever. Your hips swerved to and fro your thick legs and full hips engulfed me as you sat next to me. You placed your hands on mine and smiled, I smiled back, dirty thoughts appeared in my mind, and I hung my head in shame.

My sense of pride had been shattered; my self control questioned whatever was wrong with me? I was deeply confused. I was still admiring your curvy physique and your silky skin as you sat next to me. The words you spoke at that time meant nothing; all I could do, was focus on the aroma that came from your presence. There was a twinkle in your eyes and I wondered if it was a sign of some sort. I paid attention to the way you held my hand, then the way, in which you lay your head on my shoulder as you continued talking about the subject, I was unable to corroborate. I looked down at you resting on me, your breasts stood out full and firm, you looked stunning with your legs touching mine; there was extra warmth that I grew passionately attached to and in that moment, I forgot who we were and I took pleasure in comforting you. I passed my hands down the length of your arms and the heat rose under them but was broken by your reaction to my silence. You looked up at me and smiled your infectious smile causing me to automatically smile back, as I sensed our connection. Beads of sweat ran down my head as the reality settled in once again, and the fairy-tale rode away with the daylight. I could not understand or explain this…what do I do? I knew this was absurd, and I could not confide in anyone.

I knew that I was a great father and husband, Sheila told me so all the time. If I stepped out of line at this point, my good name would be smeared. I would lose everything, the embarrassment would be immeasurable. I remained focused on what was important. My family came first, keeping them together was important. I could not hurt Sheila by giving in to this. You would not get to me; I would leave here tomorrow, never to utter a word to anyone about this ridiculous and tempting scenario. It was not my intention to share the room with you, but due to the mix up with the reservations, and the only other option being, looking for another hotel, I succumbed to it; since we got in at 3am the hassle of another hotel was too much . This however, was definitely a mistake, what was I thinking?

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I realize that you have put some distance between us; you’re not drinking anymore. You have been spending most of your time on the computer. It’s our last night here; we leave at 7 in the morning, so this must end tonight since for me it’s now or never. I have mustered up all the courage and confidence needed to go against my upbringing and make the first move. A glass of coconut rum on the rocks, had aided in giving me the confidence for my task at hand. I was ready for you, longed for you, and as my heart raced, I wondered if you would embarrass me or turn me away. I sat quietly in anticipation, as I hoped that this would not change our relationship negatively, I did not want to make things awkward between us. Instead, I wanted to delight in you and our forbidden love and passionate desires.

My plan was thrown into action when you walked through the door; I took up my robe and headed to take a shower. I knew you could see me, after all the bathroom stood in the middle of the room, enclosed by clear glass, which frosted up once the hot water was turned on. So I took a cold shower, an extremely long one. I glanced in your direction at intervals and saw you sitting on your bed with your back to me. I tried to enjoy my shower but the longing and eagerness was getting the better of me. I fantasized about you satisfying my deepest desires, I closed my eyes and felt your hands on me, pleasuring me, caressing me, fondling, kissing, gosh!… I needed you. I opened my eyes and felt the impatience and craving take control. I stood in the tub, dried myself with the towel then dropped it to the floor, and walked out naked. With a single intention, I walked over to you.

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I felt it, tonight was like no other, I tried keeping myself busy, I refrained from alcohol because it obviously clouded my judgement. Tonight there was nothing in my system but you. There was an electric jolt in the room, as I walked in I felt it. The little voice in my head said “don’t stay in this room tonight” but I did not comply. I saw you go into the bathroom and instead of leaving the room like I usually did; I went straight to my bed. I was enticed; I looked at you at phases, each time I was fortunate you weren’t turned my way. My mouth fell open when you turned around with your eyes shut; I gazed at you touching yourself, my eyes tracing every stroke your hands made. You were remarkable; it made me want you instantaneously.

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It was now or never, my confident stride across the room was incredible, I felt so in control in that moment. That’s why I walked up to you; the expression on your face when you looked around was exactly what I was hoping for. I saw shock and desire, both at the same time. I placed my finger on your lips, because you didn’t need to say anything. You turned around, your body now facing mine, as you sat on the bed with me standing in front of you. I straddled you, my finger still on your lips, as you look at me questioning my next move. I removed my finger from your lips and adjusted myself on top of you. My knees were apart from each other, with you between my nakedness. My face now inches from yours; I knew then that you were mine. I felt you hard underneath me, and I knew you could no longer resist. I moved in closer to you, allowing our lips to touch… and then, I closed my eyes and heard your breathing intensify, as you kissed me deeply. I expected it, the passion rose, fireworks went off. The heat rose and our bodies became wet from the lustrous, forbidden desires and in unison we climaxed. I had won! I was entirely fulfilled by our lovemaking. It was much more than I had hoped for or imagined.

As I lay in your arms I looked at you, the love that I felt could no longer be contained within me, it’s then I had said “I love you Peter, my lover, my friend, MY FATHER!!!” you did not respond but the hold you had around my neck, as I lay in your arms tightened and it caught me by surprise. This was serious, I couldn’t breathe, and I gasped for air and fought as hard as I could. You kept squeezing. I couldn’t understand it. You were hurting me after we had made passionate love and then… I was no more.

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I knew you were up to something; I should have listened to the voice in my head. That voice had always guided me precisely. However my mistake tonight had to be corrected. It was your intention to devise my end; why else would you have given yourself to me in this way, and after everything, said that! You needn’t remind me of who I was. I could not allow this; the weakness I felt with you, for you, was terrifying. You had broken me down, and would have destroyed everything I worked hard for. I needed to protect what was important. So my dear, I won!

I carried my head high, and beamed with pride as I folded you in the tub. This is where you would stay; I got dressed and drove down to the hardware in the neighboring town. I got all my supplies and hurried back to the room with hours to spare before check out. I liquefied your body; you meant nothing to me anymore. I sat there looking at where you once lay, my emotions were dead. My spirits were low, and a dreadful look was now plastered on my face, as the recollection of it all came rushing back. I sat in wonder as I uttered “Stacy…my daughter…you’re gone!”