Jabba dabba do

Remind me never ever never to cop off a Jawa again. 

This shit is obviously laced with bile of tauntaun. Should've listened to the wookie. What the fuck am I saying? I can't understand a damn thing that wook says, he might as well have been talking to me about having sex with ewoks and I wouldn't know the difference. Whose idea was it to let shag carpets fight for the Alliance anyway? The Princess? She's done enough space dust to fill a Death Star with... Ohhh, hellion no, looks like JarJar is coming on hard, I think he took twice the dose! May the force be with you muthafucka, oh gosh, he is so screwed... just don't talk to me... the spit is bad enough when you aren't lit to the gills... This is getting freaky enough that I shouldn't have to worry about explaining Gungan spit slime stains on my uni to the council in the morning... hope I get my  shit together before the meeting. 

Going to have to lay low. Swim in. Swim out. Try not to look like my face is melting off. Hold on. My face always looks like it is melting off what the fuck do I have to worry about? I'm good. I'm good.

All good.

Why worry? 

Worry? What worry? What was I worrying about?

Damn, this stuff set my brain to echo. No worries...w'rries...rries. 

Look at that sweet little tadpole on the other side of the cantina. Check her out of my right eye. Ok, now the left... wish I could look at her with both at the same time without looking cross-eyed. That just kills it every time. Oh damn, she may be a few tentacles short of being legal; last thing I need is to get busted in the cantina gumming on an underage handjobmaiden while tripping my gills off on tauntaun bile. I can just see my career going down the hatch... have to stop stressing this stuff or I will end up looking like a nemoidian who smokes too many deathsticks... 

Just have to let it ride. Jusssssssst have to chilllllllllllaxxxxxxx... 

Damn I wish Solo was here. He always knows how to slide a fella through a dose like this. CRAP! Jabba dabba do not do that! JarJar! YOU CAN'T JUST START HUGGING EVERYONE IN THE CANTINA! 

Fuck...

Now everyone knows. Stop staring at me... No I'm not tripping, you just look like I'm tripping...