Creation

Looking down at my blanket of stars and sky I knew something more was needed. The idea of Earth was a bit of a joke- I never expected it to be the monstrosity it is today. I was high when I made it. If you didn't know, as God, I am high whenever I chose to be. All I have to do is snap my fingers and I'm spiraling through the Milky Way, floating with the clouds and craving Cheetos. Anyways one day, I was bored out of my mind and I created Earth. It was my little dollhouse, my hobby for a while. Adam and Eve, well I created them in the image of myself. It is true that I created Adam first, however the idea of masculinity and femininity was not created by I. No, my little creatures created it themselves. At first, it was fun. Watching them take in the beauty of my world, enjoy the presence of each other, and create children and miniature versions of themselves. I felt like a proud parent. However I also watched as they created gender and race to separate each other, I watched as they interpreted my creation in vain and used my name for violence and war. I watched as they fought, killed, cheated, and lied. Not that I blamed them. I did create them so surely it was my own fault. But then, they began to tear down the forests. The most pure gift I had given them, nature, was bulldozed and cemented over. I watched as my precious glaciers melted and my other non-human creations were forced into extinction. I watched as my world was polluted and diseased with consumption, fear, and greed. Only once the last trees were cut down and half the world was submerged in the hazardous ocean did I realize my fatal flaw in the creation of humans: I gave them too much, and with that they developed a thirst that they could not quench, even when every last thing they could take was gone. The great thing about being God though, is that I can just snap my fingers and all of my Earthly worries fade away. Boy, am I craving some nachos right about now!