Abigail

She swore she never would,

She would never leave without saying goodbye

She was one of those girls who would smile and wave,

But nothing else,

Afraid of what she might say.

I was her friend, at least I thought,

And perhaps I failed, perhaps I succeeded,

But I guess I'll never know.

I heard your scream, clear as day,

And I rushed to your house, not knowing why,

And I hated myself the second I opened your bedroom door.

I could feel you there, your spirit,

I could smell your Marc Jacobs perfume,

And I could hear your last tears pounding the ground,

I didn't know what to say.

I collapsed to the floor, crawling to you,

Whispering, "Abby, Abby? Please, don't leave" and I, too, began to cry.

But you were already gone.

I held you in my arms, those last moments, whispering and cradling you, as if you were already mine,

I needed, CRAVED, you to hear my voice, to hear the wreckage in my churning stomach, my hopeful heart still beating in my chest.

"Abby, Abby please don't leave, don't leave, I need you to say goodbye."

Goodbye?

How could you say without saying goodbye?

Your pale blue eyes stared blankly back at me, and finally I felt my world shatter.

I cried into your shoulder, I pretended for a second you were still alive,

And I swore I heard you faintly say, "it's okay Adam, I'm still here. I'll always be here for you. It's okay to let go."

I looked up and saw your angelic face, 

You waved at me.

I waved back.

You smiled at me.

I smiled back.

You said, "friends never say goodbye."