Demons

     I don't really know why I feel this way. I've felt this way before, it's the calm before the storm. I think I'm starting to get bad again, not like breaking the rules bad, but bad in the way that I do things that result in me getting hurt. I hate this feeling, all that has to happen is one little trigger, one action, no matter how big or small. I've been okay for awhile now, almost a year, and I don't want those feelings to come back, but I think they are. I just want to cry and disappear for awhile, maybe forever if that was an option. I think things that people fear. I don't want these feelings anymore, I was doing so well, so happy, optimistic, having great times with my friends. And now, they're the reason I feel like this, their one action, their words, their one little joke. I just want to disappear, I don't think I can stress this enough, there are no words to describe how I'm feeling. I shouldn't be here, I don't want to be here.