neon sin

i have no ability to sit still, for that is not how i was made.

i am not a lady of purity or fine strength, rather a wild, ephemeral kind of being.

i laugh often and cry often, take those as will have me, and beguile them with my fertile charms.

i am sin, but a red-blooded neon kind of sin, not a sin that goes bump in the night, rather one that goes to nightclubs in sequins and lace, that laughs too loud and drinks too much, a sin without secrets, an earthy sin. 

neon is a stable element, but it comes in chaos red, which is how i paint my life. like neon, i am stable in my wildness, my confidence, my disregard. 

i laugh without smiling and smile without laughing. there is no other way to be. i am not authentic. i am cheesy and bold. but who doesn't like a cheesy bold girl? 

one day, they say, i will find myself and realize what a shallow solid thing i am. at that, i smile my endless clever grin and think that i know what kind of thing i am. i am shallow and neon bright and sinful, but without me there cannot be comfort and laughter. 

the world has had enough of its professionals and thinkers. it is the era of whores.