And it All Goes Away

My mom was raised hardcore Christian, which I can respect,

But if God doesn't love me, I don't want to have to love him.

She constantly tells me she feels bad she never took me to church,

But it'd be embarrassing when I fall asleep in the pews.

She asks me "you do believe in God, right? Because I want you to go to heaven with me."

"Well, yeah. Duh."

Mom... You're not going to heaven, if there is one.

She asked me yesterday,

"You don't like girls, do you? Please tell me you don't. I want you in heaven with me."

"No, mom. That's stupid."

I mentally apologize to my girlfriend.

"B-bisexuality.... Sounds like a liberal fad. Idiots."

"Yeah, mom. I know, right?"

I push my identity deeper down inside me.

"Look at this guy! Dressed all... Faggot-y."

"He... Does wear some ugly shirts, mom."

I cringe at the horrible word.

"Please don't tell me you're gay when you're older. I'd still love you, but... It'd be hard."

"Of course not. I'll have a husband by then."

It's hard now, mom. It's really, really hard.

"I love you," my beautiful girlfriend says.

"I love you too."

And suddenly it's all just so easy.