I know what you're thinking and I know right now, you don't want to hear the words coming out of my mouth because you've finally found that thing, that one thing, that's pushed you to the dirt, hard enough, so you don't have to care anymore. 

Caring is exhausting. I'm not gonna tell you otherwise, I know. I've cared for everyone that isn't me and it's led me to the brink of ending my own life, but there's a reason I didn't and a reason why you shouldn't either. Killing yourself is selfish. It's morbid. I'm not saying it's a sin and you're going to hell, 'cause even though that story has a lot of fans, it doesn't mean it's true. I'm saying that you're giving up something - the rest of your life.

Tomorrow isn't promised; tonight isn't either, but what can be promised is the fight in you. There's just an inch of your so-called dignity, or emotions, or whatever you think is so insignificant about yourself, but let me tell you, that inch of you can become so much grander than you've imagined. 

Your life is a blessing. It's a gift. It's an absolute miracle and you musn't throw it away. The world is unfair. It's gonna make you want to do this all the time if you don't think you deserve otherwise. And let me tell you, you do. You deserve everything, but you have to work for it. You lost, get up again and try. I can't tell you how many times failure has been my fuel and how many times my pain has made me happy in the long-run.

It can feel like it's never-ending, but be still. That's what I tell myself when things are going by too fast. Be still. The world ain't waiting on you, but you can wait for your right mind to catch up. You owe it to yourself. Breathe deep and relax. I know that pit in your stomach, the pain so intense you feel it churn into a ball inside your vey core. Your hands go all tingly and your breathing becomes erratic and you're screaming silently to yourself. I know, but even that passes. 

Then there are those times you feel worthless, but that's just you not working hard enough. When I feel like that, I tell myself it's time to sleep a little later and get up a little earlier and work - reading, writing, working the cash register - anything that keeps me feeling productive. Everyone has dreams sweetie and the grander they are, the more of yourself you have to put in. Now, like I said, tonight isn't promised and neither is tomorrow, but that fight in you, that little flame that can become an inferno, that tiny inch of you that you think is the only thing you have left, those can be promised, if you're a person of your word. Just be still and then take off without looking back. New obstacles, new you, new results everytime and you will grow, stronger and firmer than anyone who just gets things handed to them and when you do, you'll have all the confidence in the world. You're gonna blossom and be somebody great. You're gonna attract everything you coveted with your newfound success and positivity. You just need to promise to keep that fight in you going and if you give up now, well that spark in your eye, that fierceness I still feel from you, that's gonna disappear too. 

So don't give up hun. There's beauty to come from this. There's glory in healing. There's a brighter light to shine on the current bleakness that you feel. You can expect it. It's just timing that fucks us up, but even time can't take away what's rightfully yours sweetie. So live it like you own it. 'Cause you do.