The Lies I Told Her
When I first spoke I told her,
that I really liked her,
that I wanted nothing more than to ask her out,
that I was nothing like the other guys,
that I would never hurt her.
When I held her hand and whispered I love you for the first ever time,
I cried for the first time in front her,
I said it was the first time I had ever felt such a way,
I listened as she said it back,
and for the first time my heart felt a real emotion,
guilt.
Each night before bed, I would make her a promise,
that we would last forever,
that I could picture our future,
that I only ever thought of her.
Lies,
All of it lies,
Every single thing was a lie,
To her,
To her family,
To her friends,
And at the end of the day,
To myself.
Nothing but lies.
But I couldn't stop,
I couldn't admit it,
Even now I tell myself it's all okay,
But it's not.
On our last day together,
one hand was placed on her cheek,
as I promised that long distance would work,
all while the other hand hid behind my back,
with nothing but crossed fingers in my palm.
I never loved the first girl I loved,
But she'll never know the Truth.