Exile of The Mind

When one hears the word 'exile' usually they immediately think of being relocated to a remote area away from civilization and those you know. But there is a different type of exile that is, in itself, even worse than being exiled to a far away place.

It is exile of the mind, I speak of. But what exactly is 'exile of the mind'? But instead of answering you with a direct statement, I shall describe my current predicament, which I believe to be exile of the mind, the heart, and -- in some ways -- even of the soul.

I live in a world that is much like your own -- assuming that you are living in the twenty first century that is -- but at the same time it is very different. For example, nothing is illegal officially -- by officially I mean that there is no laws that say it is against the law to do this or that. And war is no longer a struggle for natural resources or even land or power, but rather war has become -- as far as my intellect can fully grasp -- a means to control the populace's mind set, even to the point of having a murderous mind set towards virtually anyone they please. Yet, there must be some sort of loop hole in their system, for I do not feel that murderous rage towards the individual that is "appointed" -- at least that is the only word I can think of to describe to way I see it -- which is always constantly changing from one civil criminal or war criminal to another. The truth is flexible and constantly changes whenever they deem a change necessary, yet no one notices the change; it's almost as if they've destroyed the human mind's ability to remember significant details through conditioning. But for some reason, I am unaffected -- or at least so far as I know -- by all of this somehow; and therefore, my very existence is a form of defiance to them but it is also a form of exile.

After all, I cannot share my observations, my feelings, or even my true opinions, with anyone. For as I said earlier, nothing is illegal; but since nothing is illegal, everything is legal. There is no end to what they can do if they wish, no law -- made by man or otherwise -- holds them back. And so, I live in a constant state of terror at the very real possibility of being discovered by them and being exterminated.

I remember several people, who now -- according to their records -- never existed. They were exterminated; why? I don't know, others don't even look twice at it when someone suddenly never existed, as if that was the truth all along. But I assume it was because they themselves weren't ignorant to the truth of everything, just as I am.

This whole world has become something powerful but horrifying if you see it for what it really is.

- Michael Hall