New year’s resolution #1

Last year a girl walked up to me and told me her and her two friends, standing shyly from a distance, wanted to tell me how pretty they think I am. Without even thinking, I asked her if it was some kind of a prank or dare. Her brow slightly furrowed. She had meant it.

I'm thinking about that now in these early days of the new year. I'm thinking about how undeserving and unworthy of a compliment, I had belittled myself to. Someone thinking that I'm pretty or beautiful or exquisite was inconceivable.

The way we belittle and degrade ourselves like that, is abusive. The way we dehumanize ourselves because of the blemishes on our skin, the disproportionality of our features, the scars of our pasts, is unkind.

This year, I'm nursing those wounds of unkindness, contempt and shame upon this body. I'm washing away the self-doubt. I'll scrub the self-hate with everything that I've got. Looks like, self-love is in season and I must say, it looks great on everybody. And if a compliment comes my? I'm going to wear it and own it.