Love does that to you

Her marriage was ruined, by her and him, by the both of them. Their arguments, differing point views, and their stubbornness broke what might have been. 

She gave him the best years of her life, the best 20 years of her youth that was riddled with anger, sadness and contempt. Her life was supposed to be good. Getting out of her mother's home, her oppression, yet she was led to another, lied to repeatedly that this was her happily ever after.

In the end, it was nothing but heartbreak and a whole of regrets that she held in her heart.

And yet, here he sat, begging her to come back, begging her to give this might have been another chance. He promised her more things, things that she had believed that he would have fulfilled, even before the ring was on her finger.

But she wasn't 20 anymore. She was 40. She wasn't that desperate girl, nor that girl that love him and willing to bet on what she has now to have what she wishes to have. She wasn't willing to make another gamble, after so many gambles that she had done in vain. She was done with the addiction of giving him another chance.

He still didn't want to let her go. She didn't care about it a bit.

The love for him in her was completely gone, diminished over time like how rain demolished the great buildings of mankind into slabs of stones that had no engravings to create meaning.

Yes, the great buildings were the structures of her heart and soul, and the engravings were the love that she carved into those structures. He was the rain, an endless rain that just never stop and eroded the love she had.

What was next? The rain don't stop at love. It stops when the slabs of stones are finally eroded to small minerals, taking away the pieces of her that make up her. She wasn't just no longer that young girl; she wasn't also the person that was build on that foundation because he had been chipping away that now.

Love does that to you. It keeps you bound even to the most damaging thing, because your engravings holds a part of the meaning to your life. It became your lifeline, your future.

And the thing is, it's painful, so painful, to have those engravings to be eroded by the very thing that made you gave meaning to those engravings. And the thing is, until those engravings are gone, you have no choice, but to bound by the feelings that held you there, while you go through that painful process of erosion.