Blurry daze

Smoky haze

Timeless days

These were the symptoms of my habits

Bitten fingernails pressed tightly to dirty glass

Overwhelming

Exhilarating

In one breath

Such a shameful part of my pride

Bittersweet

Contradicting lifestyle, only a memory now

A blurry, faded memory

Of fading into loud music and paranoia

A piece of a phase that used to be my now

Why can I only picture myself when it’s a past version of me