Happy?

Am I happy? I don't know. Am I sad? I don't know. The only thing that I know is I'm trying my best to live, live my life with a mixture of every emotion that I can name of. Life is piling up on me, pushing me into the abyss of darkness. At first, I feel suffocate but now empty is filling its place. I'm accepting the emptiness because it's a part of me too. Will I ever be happy? I don't know. To feel happy in sadness is a blessing. To breath when you're suffocating in life is a blessing. Dream, hope, keep going. Yesterday me, present me and future me, they are all a part of me. One day, the future that I can't imagine will be my present, the present that crushing me now will be my past. One day, I'm going to ask myself again, am I happy? One day.