Eyes

'STOP STARING AT ME! What do you want!?' It had eyes that glowed brightly. I couldn't see anything except for those eyes. It was hidden in the shadows by the side of an old brick house. I shifted my legs and turned to it. Little splinters of wood were sticking into my hands as the old wooden table creaked from my weight. The grass turned black and the eyes grew bigger pushing itself into my thoughts. 'No, no, no, no, it's not real, it's not real.' Tears formed into my eyes and I felt the darkness from that shadow shift turning into a thick haze of fog as it came to surround me. The world around me seemed to pause and the fog became insatiable. Everything sinister and vile attacked my mind. It was worse than death, worse than-

"Willow!" My friend was standing outside calling my name. "Are you okay? You should come inside." I looked to the side of the house to find it disappeared. "Yah, I'm okay. Sorry I was just getting some fresh air!", I chuckled smiling at her. "I know it's your first time, so you might not feel it yet", she said comforting me.

That was the first night that began my addiction. Every weekend at the mall with a five dollar bill in my pocket I would meet up with friends. I'd hand the five over to my dealer and she'd pull out a sheet of acid. It looked like a sheet pulled out of a children's coloring book. She'd hand me a little square of the picture and I'd run off with my bestfriend popping it in my mouth to look for the boy I had a crush on. There was about fifty us and we would all run around the mall high off of some kind of drug. The boys would compete in who could take the most tabs of acid. The stores would close down around us and couples would be off in discreet places. I would be sitting in the lap of my crush while my mom thought I was sitting in the movie theater with popcorn in my lap. I was fourteen at the time or at least I think I was. The weekends blurred together and the weeks flew by. My memory from those days is almost nonexistent except for the times I experienced trauma. When you're surrounded by drug users and dealers who are maybe five, six years older than you dealing drugs out to young highschoolers and middle schoolers, shit happens.

The last night that ended my addiction was sudden. Nobody told me to stop and nobody condemned my use. I made the decision. There is no reason as to why I quit. I still don't know to this day. My mind abused by chemicals took control I assume, because my life was still disastrous and I never wanted to be sober. There are just some things in life that you can't explain.