Ash
“I can’t tell her. If I do, she’ll hate me. Please. Please, forgive me, my love. Please . . . Forgive me . . .”
My friends and family were confused by my pregnancy since they had never seen me with any other man, but I was happy. I knew who the father was. I wanted this child to be born and see the world around him and live happily with me and his family. A few months passed and my little baby boy was born. I kissed my baby’s head while my family had pale faces. Something scared them. Do they know the child’s father? But why do they look at me with pity more than fear?
I named my son Ash because of his ash grey hair that he got from his father. My father then told me that my son was a bad omen and to expect certain signs of death. I asked him why, but he silenced his tongue from me. I don’t know what signs he meant, so I just focused on raising my baby boy. Ash was such a happy baby, but at the age of one he started acting strange. He became more quiet and would often look out at something. He points his finger behind me and tries to reach out, but when I turn around I see nothing. I thought he was looking at his toys, but his eyes were following something, something I couldn’t see. I began to feel a cold chill while Ash was calm.
Ash was quite the crawler, but you don’t know how many times he had given us a heart attack whenever something tried to hurt him. Mother was gardening while Ash was learning to walk when he follows after his ball and walks to the street. A car was driving as it heads towards Ash and my mother screamed. She runs for Ash, but then there was a loud crash. I ran outside and see Ash standing in the middle of the road as the car was smased right in front of him as though a solid wall was placed between them. Instead of looking at the car that almost killed him, Ash was staring at something else above him. Me and my mother run to him as I grab Ash and hug him tightly, relieved and scared. I take him back to the house while Ash stares over my shoulder and waves bye to someone.
Ash was a year and a half when he was curious about death. Not in a bloody, gruesome way, but in a more cultural sense. He was interested in how the grim reaper was described to the world and began reading many books that involved death in folklore. This was right after his first Día de los Muertos, which he loved and enjoyed, and mentioned he said hi to many relatives, which most of them I couldn't see. From the Egyptian god of death, Anubis, to the Greek god, Thanatos, to Hindu's god, Yama, to even the Banshee from Ireland. Ash loved to see death in different cultures and thought they all looked colorful. He even told me that all these figures were fair and netural and were not scary at all. The Banshee sings a mourning song for the dead, Thanatos was an attractive god of nonviolent death, Anubis protected the dead, and Yama judges if you should be punished, joined his palace, or be reborn. I never knew death had so many different personifications since I'm more familiar with the western version. And even his father wasn't anything like that.
Ash was two years old now, but something was wrong.
No one smiled on his birthday and he barely had any presents except from me. I had given him a locket with our picture from Día de los Muertos. Ash was happy to receive my gift and we were about to start his party when suddenly we hear a loud crash in our backyard. My family stayed inside the house, trembling and sweating, while me and my son peeked outside. We see strange figures standing in our yard, but there was one I knew most and Ash runs outside to him.
"Dada!" Ash runs outside while I follow him, but my family holds me back. I yell at them to let me go, but they had tears in their eyes and refused. They knew this would happen. I look back at my baby as he runs to his father, who smiles and hugs him tightly. His father was a handsome man, and only a man dressed in black, as he smiles lovingly at his son, who recognizes him. He then look up to meet my confused eyes and lost his cheerful smile.
"Please forgive me, my love . . ." he said as he carries our son in his arms.
"No . . ." I said as tears fell from my eyes.
"Mija . . ." said my mother as she pulls me away and tells me the prophecy of the grim reaper. I was shocked to hear that this was the year for choosing Death's heir and it just happened to be Ash since he was the strongest link to Death, being a blood relative and all. I look back at my lover and my son, who smiled innocently at me. I pushed my family away and ran to them. Now I know why Ash was never hurt. His father was there, watching him, protecting him. The other figures stopped me with a mere look and I felt a wall hit me as I fell down. I sat up and look at my baby and his father, who looked back at me. Ash turn to his father and whispers in his ear before Death nodded and smiled. Ash turns to me and said, "Mama! Sing our lullaby! I want Dada's friends to hear it!"
I don't know why he wanted me to sing his lullaby, but I nodded. I sang that ominous song from a children's show Ash watched once, which made him feel at peace whenever he hears this. Death smiles at me as he cradles Ash while the other figures felt at ease. Next thing I knew I felt Death wrapping his arms around me and Ash's warmth beside me. I hugged them both and cried and kissed them lovingly.
"Please, take care of him," I told Death as he nodded and smiled. "I will."
I smiled at them both before I let them go as Ash waves at me while holding his father's hand. "Bye, mama! I'll come visit you!"
"Bye, sweetie! I love you both!" I waved back as I smile with tears falling from my eyes. My baby boy was leaving with his father and the other figures as they leave to their realm while I fall on to my knees and cried.
Goodbye, Ash. I hope you smile for everyone and give them mercy.